#i had a great time learning basic html to make a website
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it turns out learning to code to actually make something is fun. Once again
#i had a great time learning basic html to make a website#and now me and my gf are trying to make a video game and itâs super exciting#and Iâm learning blender too! wheeeee#static
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hello all! i know i have not been as active as usual lately, and that is due to a number of reasons that i'd prefer to not get into.. do expect my hiatus to last a little longer, though please do not feel bad about sending requests in, infact i would prefer to have as many as possible before i decide to start tackling editing again! now that that is aside, i thought i would make a small guide for bundlrs with what i've learnt over the past few months.. though anybody is free to correct me, as i am very much a beginner! with that said, let's get into how to make a bundlrs!

WHAT IS BUNDLRS? bundlrs is like if you combined rentry and neocities. they had a child together, and it's bundlrs. based in markdown and html, most codes from things like spacehey, neocities and rentry metadata will work natively within bundlrs, so transferring is a breeze! backups are made at midnight US time every single day and then stored for a week! also created at 00:00 on the first of every week (kept for a month), every month (kept for a year), and every year (kept for 5 years) (taken directly from the bundlrs info!) now, i'm not very good at coding. im sure alot of people aren't, that's why rentry is so popular. you get to have your own little website while basically not having to know anything! bundlrs is preferable, atleast to me, because of the customization it allows while also being user-friendly! and while i am a coder, i'm by no means a good one, which is where we get to our next part..

BUNDLRS TEMPLATES!! yes, just like rentry templates people will make templates for this silly little thing too! referencing other peoples code, finding youtube tutorials and even looking at and modifying templates by others so long as you give credit to the original coder in my opinion is alright! lavendergalactic on here has some great bundlrs templates, i'm constantly singing their praises to my friends!

URLS.. WHAT ARE THEY?
urls are what you put to make a site! make an account at bundlrs.cc dashboard first, believe me, its easier, and then go back to bundlrs.cc! youll be met with a very rentry-like grey box for content, a place for your custom url and your password/ edit code! if you want help with markdown, click the info section at the bottom and it'll take you to a premade guide by the bundlrs staff! cool, right? now, words youll hear alot are claiming and trading. to claim a url means to have one of those funky urls in your pastes/ under an edit code you know! and trading, well that just means trading urls between users! personally, i love it, but if you don't, thats okay! you can always try find a compromise for the url you want with underscores or dashes or numbers!!

i really could go on and on about this site,, its so amazing! but i also know my friends are waiting for me on a game.. so, i think i have to wrap it up here, folks! im sorry if you didn't learn too much, like i said, i'm a beginner myself and very much in a rush today.. yet, i still hope you enjoyed my little ramble meant for my friends and myself!~ much love to everybody, and i'll see you all soon!~

#bundlrs#prophets talking#rentry#bundlrs help#metadata#stellular#stellular help#metadata help#bundlrs advice#bundlrs.cc#editblur#html#markdown#markdown help
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neocities heracles trials: from a chaotic newbie
okay so i want to actually start posting here and i finally got it through my thick skull that this is LITERALLY A BLOG. i'm supposed to blog. so here's a blog post.
anyways, for context, i've been working on my neocities for a while now, recently started over to make things more original and more me. another thing to note is that i'm using VScode.
the issue here is that i have zero well not exactly zero but i lack any professional/academic background experience with making websites. the html isn't the issue (thankfully) but holy shit dude...css+javascript implementation . basic styling with css is no biggie, right? absolutely, however...may i introduce: smooth transitions + the absolutely tragic fact that the <marquee> tag is deprecated an accessibility issue.
so, my first goal day one was to recreate a marquee animation through css. so i tried to simply implement this incredibly useful bit of code into my site (in which if you're interested i totally think my failure to get it working was user error so please check it out it works great if you're not me) but, lo and behold, despite me getting it to work in my V1 project, i could not, for the life of me, get it to work. so i, not too familiar with css animation and completely lost when it comes to javascript, started grasping at straws. i ended up finding this tutorial and, with some improvisation since the tutorial is for webflow and i'm manually writing everything, managed to make my own css recreation of a marquee effect essentially from scratch, and even learned about the animation-play-state css attribute so i could pause the effect when the marquee is hovered over! victory, basically.
then, i looked around the many cool and absolutely awesome sites on neocities to get inspiration, and then i was like "hey what if i made a custom button background image" and with some trial and error, made myself a pretty decent base (for now) with aseprite, and learned more about the program in the meantime which is always a plus.
then i decided that i wanted to do more with the buttons. i wanted to make it animate on hover. not too hard right? you'll...you'll see why i struggled...in a moment...
anyways, i settled on a simple shrink animation. which THIS i could do with ease, messed around a bit, got the keyframes, assigned that to the button:hover and all of that and all was good!...until i realized that once i stopped hovering over it, it snapped back to its original scale instead of transitioning smoothly again. THIS is where the "fun" began.
see, although i can wrap my head around things easily when it comes to css, i have to constantly look up what the proper syntax for everything is because otherwise i'll mess everything up. and through my research i had conducted (aka surfing through multiple blogs and reddit posts alongside other things on random forum websites) i had discovered the very neat transition attribute.
but we'll have to return to this because i have adhd, and i ended up getting distracted during this process. see, originally i had decided that the button would change it's visual to appear like it was pressed when the user's mouse hovered over it. then i was like "i don't think this makes sense" so i changed it so that the button wouldn't change its background image unless the user actually clicked on it. so i did that. then i had to make sure that the button wouldn't magically scale up again so i had to transform the styling and blah blah blah those details aren't really that important ANYWAYS the actual important bit about this is that if you use the transition attribute and there's a change in background images that change will also be transitioned unless you set the transition to only apply to a specific change. and i didn't know that originally. so every time i tried to fix things up with a transition so the button wouldn't snap back to it's original size out of nowhere the background would slooowly change as well and i actually got so frustrated with this that i wanted to burn something down because that's a totally normal reaction i guess. anyways, then i started frantically searching for answers on the topic and EVERY. SINGLE. THING. THAT I FOUND. INCLUDED JAVASCRIPT.
i do not know javascript. i have not learned anything about it unlike css and html. it SCARES me and it is FRUSTRATING. but i thought i'd try it anyways. news flash that shit didn't work at all and i almost thought about scrapping the animation entirely especially when it randomly stopped working when i made certain changes, but i ended up eventually figuring out what i mentioned earlier (CSS transitions and the fact that you can assign them to only affect a specific change instead of everything) so with some dabbling here and there i eventually managed to finally figure out how to make everything smooth through pure css and although it still snaps if the element hasn't finished animating i'm happy with it.
moving on to another thing, i wanted to then make a sound effect play when you click the button. yes, we are still talking about buttons. THIS i could not do with css, like, at all. javascript admittedly is for interactivity and i had already been bending the rules quite a bit with the animations since those teechnically should've been done with javascript as well but this? this was impossible without javascript. so i found a free mp3, and searched up a nice little tutorial on the very basics of javascript.
little did I know that apparently, this would be my own personal little hell.
see, no matter how many times i tried a different script, the sound just would not work like at all. i'd do everything in what i assumed to be the correct way, and no matter what, it would not play. knowing that i'd just have to revisit this, i decided it was best to just sort of put it on the back burner.
and this is where i wish i could say this is the end of my absolutely gobstopping rant. however, i cannot.
see, one thing that i really like that i've seen in a lot of other people's sites is draggable windows. i think they're sick. but this ALSO requires javascript, but i didn't think this could POSSIBLY be that bad since so many people did it.
...right?.......right? guys. right?
MOTHERFUCKER I WAS SO WRONG.
see, it turns out that a lot of people do this sort of thing with jQuery, specifically for user interfaces. but vscode doesn't have a "user friendly" way to get jquery to work with it. and because i don't want to mess with program files, i decided that logically speaking jquery just makes writing things in js scripts less complicated and doesn't introduce things that are impossible in vanilla javascript so i decided i could suffer a little bit and try and do things without jquery.
this led me to looking at many sites with draggable windows to look at their own scripts, in which every single time i tried replicating things i FAILED.
i eventually stumbled upon a nice code that worked. but the issue with it - in which unfortunately i can't find it, else i'd link it - is that it works with not only element classes but also a specific ID. see, this would be fine if i only wanted ONE draggable element. but i want multiple. and i thought that maybe if i just duplicated the script and dedicated it to a different ID and changed function names it would work but nooo life cannot be this easy apparently. so after setting up my webmaster status window, getting that to work, i tried doing the aforementioned method for what will eventually be a guestbook of sorts. it failed.
so i decided, "hey i'll revisit this later!!" and i went on to finding a way to implement a status widget into my site. this honestly was really easy as i ended up stumbling upon status.cafe . so i registered, eventually got my account activated, and i got it working in my live port of vscode just fine!! all is good in the world.
well that's what i thought until i found out that since i had created my neocities account in march of 2024, and i'm unemployed since i'm still in high school hence i have a free account, that i could not. use the widget. in neocities. so i tried finding a work around, found this handy guide (which is genuinely useful by the way) and set up things through a RSS feed instead which is essentially just a work around that complies with the security restrictions of neocities that i'm bound by. anyways, this works great but i literally just can't customize it to how i want so this is another fail. then i find imood.com which, although is NICE, doesn't suit what i want on its own. so i'm at a loss here too.
so, again, another thing to put to the side i suppose.
so i started working on getting my guestbook, browsed through people's homepages again, and found chattable . and you probably think i have another paragraph complaining about this but honestly i can't write about something when i can't figure out how to even create a chat to implement onto my site in the first place so...y'know.
plus, i honestly have no clue if it'll work on my site either due to security restrictions so this is fun!!
anyways, after dealing with all of this, i finally decided it was about time i ported what i had so far over onto my neocities account. which isn't actually that hard i just had to wipe all of my files, overwrite the content in my index.html file there and paste in what i have now, and then upload my new files. but for some god awful reason after i went through all of this chrome just. kept depending on my old stylesheet??? so i had to clear some of my browsing data and eventually everything was loading properly for me.
and THIS is finally the end of my ridiculous documentation concering my neocities adventure so far.
i have no doubts i'll end up ranting here AGAIN about all of this but for now this is all i have on my plate...besides finally caving and learning javascript for real and continuing to learn more about html and css. hopefully one day i'll stop having such frequent issues but now is not the time and i doubt that'll be anytime soon either.
moral of the story, if you want to start something new and pick up a new hobby, please for the love of all that is of substance in this world don't go in completely blind like i've done if you're going to be making a project of some sorts. it will only lead to many misfortunes.
anyways you can see what i currently have done in my neocities here, make suggestions or give advice in the notes and whatnot i don't know.
#neocities#rant post#rant#coding#web development#geocities#html#html css#htmlcoding#css#javascript#losing my mind#holy shit#send help
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how did you find the move from choicescript to twine?? I've been working on a project in choicescript but not really sure I want to host it there anymore
hello! thank you for the ask,
preface, i think both tools are great for what they were built for. i had a good time with choicescript and it was a good introduction to what variables can be used for and structuring an if game. if you don't care about UI/ appearance, then choicescript makes sense.
i will be real and say, the move to twine was difficult personally lmao because i had no experience with html, css, or javascript prior to the move -- but that shouldn't put you off. my personal approach to it was that it's a learning opportunity.
be prepared to be 'not good'. learning something new can be a really frustrating and discouraging process. things won't work the first time round, they never do, but keep reminding yourself that this is a process and the progress, and your understanding, will come with time! the best quality a dev can have is patience, especially in the if circle.
if you go into twine thinking about your long form game/project and try to port things immediately into a template, i think it will really mess with you. make something tiny first, like a tutorial game, and when you're ready move up to the long form stuff.
you don't have to do it my way, but the best way for me to learn was to just get hands on with twine templates other developers have made. get a feel for the twine programme, language, layout, interface etc etc. i will tell you right now the second day i started learning twine/ sugarcube i got stuck on how to //open// an imported file haha. learning is hard and it sucks but now i've built my own interface for my own game!
all this being said, you don't even HAVE to build an interface for your game -- it comes with a default UI that you can start using straight away. so, if you don't care about the ui/ aesthetics, twine can still be an option.
i do want to touch on publishing, because that is a huge aspect of if. twine is a free open source tool and choicescript is not. if you get to the point where you finish a game and can publish with cog/ hosted games, then just be aware that you do not //own// your own writing because it is in the choicescript language. you will only own the IP.
i was stubborn about choicescript for a very long time, i still think it has better accessibility //because// the interface is basic and the appeal of going through a publishing house is very understandable. they have a huge reach and an established audience so there's no doubt of your game having eyes on it.
twine has an advantage being open source because no one owns it. plus, it encourages self-publishing and i think that's a great thing to aspire to as a writer! i love chop shop even more now because i built and own the whole thing. technically, twine games don't even need to be on itch.io because they're just html files, so they can be hosted anywhere that supports html. if i had a website for example i could just embed it into a page.
obviously, i am going to have a lot of bias towards twine since i made the move myself haha. i'm not trying to put my own feelings into this because COG as a company was a whole other reason why i moved and that won't be discussed on this blog.
you don't have to move to twine if you don't want to publish through COG, i'm pretty sure choicescript games can be hosted on itch.io.
edit: from @/hpowellsmith in the replies: you can have a contract with Hosted Games to monetise a ChoiceScript game on itch or elsewhere online where you pay them a smaller percentage of revenue than if you're published through Hosted Games
i think if you're happy with choicescript and COG/ hosted games then go for it and, if not, there are other options out there!! it doesn't have to be twine but it's probably one of the better tools for interactive games and has a wealth of help guides/ tutorials.
sorry this was so LONG, but thanks for reading if you got this far anyways :^)
#general ask#sorry this got long! lmao#again i'm not trying to like lakeith stanfield you and scream GET OUT but just consider your options#choicescript just ended up not being the tool for me and that's okay#and good luck with your project! plus i can always help with twine problems if needed :-)#edited: read the replies too! good good advice and insight
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I came across the Phoenixdex website while researching for my own fan-region. I'm curious as to how you build the website to display your works, and do you have any recommendations when it comes to website-building?
Hi!
The Phoenixdex website is custom-coded, built on top of the ProcessWire PHP framework. ProcessWire and frameworks like it are great for building full-on database applications, but a project of that scope is usually way beyond what most people are interested in when they just want an easy personal website for showing off their fakemon stuff. I only bothered building all that myself because I work with web design and development as my actual job and it's a hobby I've had for a long time, so it used a skillset I happened to have already.
You can always go the same route if you either have or want to learn the same skills, but if you're not yet familiar with coding for the web, be aware that you'll need to obtain hosting for your site, and to learn about databases and the programming language/frameworks of your choice. (If you are curious about this, let me know and I can share some resources to help you get started/see if it's something you're really interested in!)
The much, much easier route is to sidestep all that and create a wiki-style site for your project. This is what I did before I created the fully-custom site, actually! (Although I still used my own hosting and made a few modifications, because again that is adjacent to my job/hobby and also I am a nerd.) This gives you a website that's nice and searchable but is also much easier to put together pages for than needing to learn full HTML or some kind of templating language and database APIs or whatever. It would basically be making your own custom Bulbapedia.
Most people used to recommend Fandom/Wikia for this, but there are a lot of awkward limitations and obnoxious ads and policies and it's probably best to stay away from all that. It looks like Miraheze ( https://miraheze.org/ ) is the big not-crappy wiki farm these days. I haven't used them myself so I don't have any personal experience to share about Miraheze as a host, but as I understand it they run a pretty straightforward version of MediaWiki (the same software created for Wikipedia and used for sites like Bulbapedia) so there are plenty of guides and resources out there for learning to use and customize it without Fandom's janky corporate nonsense confusing things. It's even possible to lay things out in the same format Bulbapedia uses, if you're interested in that and up for learning a little bit about MediaWiki templates, but that's far from necessaryâyou can just put your fakemon info, or trainer or move or whatever you're making a page for, onto the page in whatever format's easiest for you.
You can see an example of a fangame wiki made using Miraheze + MediaWiki on Pokémon Flux's wiki here: https://pkmnflux.miraheze.org/wiki/Main_Page They've opted to use a Bulbapedia-like layout for their content as well.
Sorry for the super basic yet kinda lengthy overview, but there're a lot of weeds you can get into when talking about website creation. I hope it at least helps get you pointed toward something that'll work for you! Let me know if anything was unclear, and best of luck getting your fan region site set up!
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I really really really love/hate the internet.
It never ceases to amaze me when I remember it was created by human beings. It seems like a bunch of images/concepts/shouts into the void, and yet behind every single element there's a person. And that's so terrifying and amazing because it's like nearly everything that we've created as a species ends up here in some form or another. And if it somehow hasn't yet, there are groups working hard to make sure it does.
I am unique from many in my generation (born 2003) because I spent a large portion of my formative years with very little internet access. As a kid I was all over those kids MMOs and virtual pet games, and as a teen I was really into tiktok, instagram, and youtube. But in between those times, after I had developed the curiosity to venture outside of neopets dot com, but before social media took over everyone's life and the internet was more than like 6 websites, I wasn't able to explore and really see what's out there. I never ran the gauntlet, stumbled upon bestgore, saw porn at age 10, was groomed on kik, or any of those experiences that so many of gen z seem to identify with. So when I gained access to the internet, all I really wanted to do was use social media and message my friends like every other kid my age was doing at the time.
Then I discovered something called elsagate. I was thrown into this rabbit hole of conspiracy theories, deleted youtube videos, and insane reddit posts about this bit of youtube that nobody except children knew about - until a few parents realized what the fuck their kids were watching and alerted the press about it.
Around the same time, I got into iceberg videos, I researched youtube drama, I talked to randos on omegle, I spent time lurking on the incel forums, I read about subreddits that had been banned, I listened to podcast episodes about real-life crime that got it's start on obscure fetish forums, I read wikipedia pages for fun, and I found some of the weirdest porn that the internet has to offer.
The truth is, I'm obsessed with the internet. And yet, there aren't a ton of books about the cultural aspect of things. Not much freely accessible research on the various fandoms, subcultures, fetish groups, micro-religions, and communities that are unique to the internet. That sucks for someone like me who wants to learn more without having to find everything from primary sources, but it's also great because that means I have a niche to fill and a hobby besides living vicariously through my sims.
I wanted this blog to be a neocities website but alas, I am a dumbass with no desire to learn basic HTML, or at least no drive to do it at the moment. I might figure it out and move everything over there but for now I'm just gonna keep things here where it's user-friendly and doesn't make me type these things <<<>>> all the time.
I'm going to write a bunch about a subject I think is interesting, do lots of research, and include my sources at the bottom. I will be using wikipedia and youtube as sources because A) aforementioned lack of secondary sources about shit like otherkins and femcels, and B) it's a tumblr account, not a college essay. I dropped out of college for a reason, I'm not about to subject myself to MLA APA format hell because I wanna write about the cultural impact of coolmathgames.
Posts will be coming whenever I am motivated to write, but hopefully I'll have something every other week or so. If you want to suggest a topic/nag me to post more/ask for more info my ask box is open. I'll also try to keep a masterlist of posts + links pinned for easy access â
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Aspects of the Early Web I'd Like to See Come Back â Speckyboy
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Aspects of the Early Web I'd Like to See Come Back â Speckyboy
The early web (weâll define it as 1995 â 2005) was an adventurous place. The narrative was that anyone could participate in this new medium. Thus, it attracted an eclectic mix of creators.
We tend to look back to these days with some cringe. Yes, the design and technology of that era were lacking. And there were very few standards to speak of. But there were also plenty of positives.
Iâm biased â my web design journey began in this era. Therefore, I have a lot of nostalgia. Iâve written about it a time or 10.
But there are things I miss about those days. Practices and ideas that defined the enthusiasm of the time. Things that have long since faded.
As such, here are some parts of the early web Iâd like to see come back â even if only for a day!
Unlimited Downloads for Web Designers
Starting at just $16.50 per month, download 1,000s of HTML, Bootstrap, and Tailwind CSS, as well as WordPress themes and plugins with Envato Elements. You will also get unlimited access to millions of design assets, photos, video files, fonts, presets, addons, and much more.
The Absence of Big Data
So-called big data wasnât prevalent in the 90s. Google would plant those seeds in the decade. However, the web was yet to be controlled by trackers and algorithms.
Perhaps we didnât have the same level of personalization. So what? The side benefit was a lack of manipulation.
We still saw this in the early days of Facebook and Twitter. Remember when your feeds were all in real time? It provided a sense of witnessing things as they happened.
Early search engines had similar perks. You were likely served the same results as someone on the other side of the world. Less convenient? Sure. But also less intrusive.
What we see now is ultimately controlled by companies. We donât necessarily see the best search results. We see whatever Googleâs algorithm deems appropriate.
Social media companies make it harder to view your feeds in chronological order. And advertisements are a little too personal, in my opinion.
Itâs easy to understand why things have changed. Manipulating users is a profitable business. Plus, advertisers want to target specific audiences.
Still, I miss the days when the web had more randomness. Stumbling upon something new seems like a lost art.
The Simplicity of Website Design & Structure
âThings were simpler back then.â Thatâs a common refrain when adults talk about their childhood. I think it also applies to web design and structure.
Thereâs a good reason for that simplicity. HTML was basic. CSS didnât even exist for part of this time. And there was only so much we could do with the dayâs technology.
I canât deny the prevalence of poor design. Web design was new. We were all amateurs in a sense. I played a role in making the place a bit unruly!
Even so, the limitations were often a good thing. The dangers of overcomplicating things became apparent. Designers eventually learned that simplicity was better for everyone.
On the other hand, we had very few standards or best practices. Things like performance, security, and accessibility received little consideration.
Today, we tend to overcomplicate things as a default. We use heavy content management systems (CMS) for brochure sites. We make a mess of security. And we use DIY tools without much thought about portability or ownership.
Perhaps the good parts of modern design can stay. But how about a resurgence of simplicity?
The Impact of the Solo Entrepreneur
Entrepreneurship is still possible on the web. Itâs the idea that an individual can make an impact with their creativity. That could be a product, service, or even great content.
I think it has become harder for individuals to succeed, though. There are too many mountains to climb.
Those algorithms make it harder to gain visibility. And there are so many people (and bots) competing for attention.
Not to say it was easy back in the day. But originality tended to shine through. Oddities like the Million Dollar Homepage are a prime example.
Early bloggers also had an opportunity to find a core audience. They built niche online communities dedicated to a shared interest.
Tools like WordPress make it easier to self-publish content. But reaching people has become a full-time job. Creators must often rely on sponsors and product placement to gain traction.
It used to be possible for content to spread organically. Search engines werenât prioritizing big sites over small ones. Thus, anyone had a shot to be seen by potential followers.
What started as a side gig could turn into something more. Thatâs still possible in theory.
YouTube and TikTok are the flavors of the minute for this. But they are walled gardens. Doing something similar on an open platform is daunting.
The Freedom to Create and Connect
I love to think of the early web as uncharted territory. We couldnât look to the past when populating this new medium. So, we made it up as we went along.
There were positives and negatives about this. Even then, some used the web for nefarious purposes. But they seemed like dark corners that were avoidable.
The bigger picture was all about freedom. Anyone could create and publish content. And the web would be a vehicle to make positive connections with others.
There was talk of the great potential it held for society. People without a voice suddenly gained one.
The biggest impediment at the time was access to technology. But that could be resolved through cheaper devices and widespread internet. The sky was the limit.
I believed in the web as a change agent. And that the world would be better for these newfound connections.
We havenât quite gotten there. Repressive regimes have stifled free speech. Bot farms spread misinformation and create division. Large corporations make the rules with little oversight.
The web didnât become a whole new world. It instead became a reflection of the one we already had.
Say it isnât so, Tim Berners-Lee.
Letting the Past Guide Us
Hereâs the good news: We now have a past era to look to. We can use it as a guide when building the webâs future.
I donât expect Google, Facebook, or Twitter/X to change their ways. Not without the mandate of a governing body. But we also donât have to follow their lead.
Those of us who build and publish can keep the ideals of the early web alive. Think of them as small pockets of resistance.
How do we do it? We can start by embracing open tools and platforms. Use a browser that focuses on user privacy. Publish with a CMS that gives you ownership. Support decentralized systems like the Fediverse.
Most of all, pass these lessons to the next generation. They havenât experienced a truly open web. Show them why itâs worth having.
Perhaps the web was bound to be changed for the worse. But we can still use our little corner of it as a beacon of light.
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#Accessibility#advertisements#agent#algorithm#Algorithms#amp#Art#assets#attention#Big Data#Bootstrap#bot#bots#browser#Building#Business#change#CMS#Companies#content#content management systems#creativity#creators#CSS#Dark#data#Design#Design Process#designers#devices
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There's No Trains To Heaven
Things I made this semester: A just barely 19 page long historiography paper. An accompanying 7 and a half page long research proposal with 22 page long annotated bibliography because I found too many interesting sources and had too much to say about them. An 8 page long paper about seditious speech that could have been a little shorter but I had too much to say about that, too. One data research analysis report (with accompanying fun bar graph). A basically functional, entirely responsive website with 7 individual pages (which I'm still putting the final touches on). In between all of this I recorded an eleven song album of nuclear reactor core folk ditties, all by my lonesome.
Tâwas a good semester.
I also changed my major. Again. This summer I'd declared a second major in history to go with my studies in emerging media and technology with a minor in web design. But I wasn't too sure about the latter degree. Part of why I was clinging to EMAT was plain ol' fear, to be completely honest. Not a crippling or conscious fear, but the oft-restated assumption lingering in the back of my head: it'll make you marketable. If you get a bachelor of arts, you'll either be out of a decent job or trapped in the stressful, low-paying world of education. Get that ~science~ certificate in your life and you'll be rolling in that dough and not destute, unlike those silly B.A. kids.
Well, I don't necessarily agree with that train of thought. Having had the concept of "STEM" shoved down my throat in even middle school, I've grown critical of the importance we place on those fields specifically. As vital as technology and science are, you also have to realize that the social sciences are just as useful to, well, society. Yet such fields are looked down upon. No wonder people nowadays are barely capable of critical thought, take everything (especially media) at face value, and barely know the basic facts about their own country's past. It's because we condition kids to doze off in their classes and not take education on any level seriously, especially not the subjects associated with boring, stuffy things like reading and interpreting and thinking. Too much hard work, let's rah-rah the football team instead.
Learning history and connecting it to the present is one of the most important things you can do to become a more aware citizen, and it's time we stop pushing this culture of self-consciousness over what people think of us because of our degrees or careers and actually work on ourselves to actually get some informed participation in society. As for the career part, my workplace on campus is proof enough to me that studying history can get you a fulfilling job that lets you utilize the skills you honed and information about the wider world you picked up in your studies. It helps you connect with people and their past experiences. It helps you contextualize the world you currently live in. And by studying things objectively, it helps you become a more logical person less swayed by disgusting propagandic appeals to emotion. It just helps you become a better person. Realizing that that is the path I want to take, as opposed to sticking with a major I just wasn't fully jiving with in the name of some enigmatic ideal of making my chosen institution proud or something, is very freeing.
The web design minor is staying because I just genuinely love twiggling around with my little HTML and CSS files and applying my graphic design Skillz in that manner. On the other hand, I've picked up another minor: creative writing. I've always taken my writing abilities for granted; I'm a great writer, I'd say. But only now have I really felt empowered (to use a cheesy term for lack of a better one) to express it in a creative way - and not just in the songwriting department. I think I felt for a while that I had to suppress my "creative" side in order to appear serious to...I don't even know who I was trying to appeal to. But my brain has been firing off in too many directions lately, and has been too inspired by the world around me and my various influences to let my individual perspective linger in the background. I gotta do me.
So I went from English while enrolling --> Journalism because I was under the assumption that all the English majors were going to be Swifties --> Public Relations for a few weeks because I had no idea what I was doing --> Emerging Media and Technology with web design concentration --> History + EMAT + web design --> History major + web design minor + creative writing minor. That's a really weird and still incomplete circle, but it's fun to think about.
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neocities guide - why you should build your own html website
do you miss the charm of the 90s/00s web where sites had actual personality instead of the same minimalistic theme? are you feeling drained by social media and the constant corporate monopoly of your data and time? do you want to be excited about the internet again? try neocities!!
what is neocities?
neocities is a free hosting website that lets you build your own html website from scratch, with total creative control. in their own words: "we are tired of living in an online world where people are isolated from each other on boring, generic social networks that don't let us truly express ourselves. it's time we took back our personalities from these sterilized, lifeless, monetized, data mined, monitored addiction machines and let our creativity flourish again."
why should I make my own website?
web3 has been overtaken by capitalism & conformity. websites that once were meant to be fun online social spaces now exist solely to steal your data and sell you things. it sucks!! building a personal site is a great way to express yourself and take control of your online experience.
what would I even put on a website?
the best part about making your own site is that you can do literally whatever the hell you want! focus on a specific subject or make it a wild collection of all your interests. share your art! make a shrine for one of your interests! post a picture of every bird you see when you step outside! make a collection of your favorite blinkies! the world is your oyster !! here are some cool example sites to inspire you: recently updated neocities sites | it can be fun to just look through these and browse people's content! space bar | local interstellar dive bar creature feature | halloween & monsters big gulp supreme peanutbuttaz | personal site dragodiluna linwood | personal site patho grove | personal site
getting started: neocities/html guide
sound interesting? here are some guides to help you get started, especially if you aren't familiar with html/css sadgrl.online webmastery | a fantastic resource for getting started with html & web revival. also has a layout builder that you can use to start with in case starting from scratch is too intimidating web design in 4 minutes | good for learning coding basics w3schools | html tutorials templaterr | demo & html for basic web elements eggramen test pages | css page templates to get started with sadgrl background tiles | bg tiles rivendell background tiles | more free bg tiles
fun stuff to add to your site
want your site to be cool? here's some fun stuff that i've found blinkies-cafe | fantastic blinkie maker! (run by @transbro & @graphics-cafe) gificities | internet archive of 90s/00s web gifs internet bumper stickers | web bumper stickers momg | gif gallery 99 gif shop | 3d gifs 123 guestbook | add a guestbook for people to leave messages cbox | add a live chat box moon phases | track the phases of the moon gifypet | a little clickable page pet adopt a shroom | mushroom page pet tamaNOTchi | virtual pet crossword puzzle | daily crossword imood | track your mood neko | cute cat that chases your mouse pollcode | custom poll maker website hit counter | track how many visitors you have
web revival manifestos & communities
also, there's actually a pretty cool community of people out there who want to bring joy back to the web! melonland project | web project/community celebrating individual & joyful online experiences. Also has an online forum melonland intro to web revival | what is web revival? melonking manifesto | status cafe | share your current status nightfall city | online community onio.cafe | leave a message and enjoy the ambiance sadgrl internet manifesto | yesterweb internet manifesto | sadly defunct, still a great resource reclaiming online social spaces | great manifesto on cultivating your online experience
in conclusion
i want everyone to make a neocities site because it's fun af and i love seeing everyone's weird personal sites that they made outside of the control of capitalism :) say hi to me on neocities
EDIT: part 2!!
#neocities#old web#webcore#old internet#web revival#indie web#html#website#recource#guide#can you tell that i've gotten REALLY into neocities this month!!!!!#but its so FUN i love seeing everyones weird af websites#its amazing#i love celebrating the old web#ANYWAYS MAKE A NEOCITIES HERES A GUIDE#i haven't touched html in like a decade#and i've been having a great time relearning#:)#share your sites with me!!!!!!#oh and share resources if you have them!
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do you have any advice for someone who kinda "failed" to break into tech and is still in the medium-level for learning. i feel like i've spent so much time (years) on this but haven't made much progress. how do i really get into it and stay in it? love your blog btw. i'm tempted to start one of my own but my projects are a mess and ugly đ
I'm sorry to hear that you feel like you haven't made much progress in breaking into tech. It's important to remember that everyone's journey is different, and it's never too late to start or improve. But then again, you have spent years learning and you want to into the tech industry.
The obvious advice would be don't give up. My dad has been studying to get into Cybersecurity since the early 90s and he just got into the industry this year. He never gave up - family to look after and he could study like the other students in his university course because the large majority of them were single 18-22-year-olds who their only responsibility is themselves. Don't give up and don't compare yourself to other people.
You've got to look at what has been holding you back. Health issues, work issues, money? Can't study full-time or even part-time if you need to pay the bills.
Even if you can, are you consistent with your studying? We all know consistency is key. Studying for one week but don't study for 2-3 weeks won't work. I know the type of learner I am - if I don't code or study every day, even just for 30 minutes, then my tendency to procrastinate will increase a lot and it'll all go downhill from there.
Know your strength - build on the skills you are good at. Believe it or not, I know a developer I met in a discord server who only uses HTML, CSS, and JavaScript to build websites and webpage themes for clients as a freelancer and he's doing really well. It's because he realised that he's really good at those three basic languages and he worked really hard to excel at them. Expand on what you know best.
On the flip side, you could look at job postings around where you live or nationally in your country and see what skills/languages/technologies they ask for the most for hiring developers. Example: I live in the UK and a couple of months ago when I was actively looking for a new Frontend Dev job, I saw that Vue.js, React.js, and PHP (besides the usual HTML, CSS, and JavaScript) were asked for the most. If I wanted those jobs, I would learn those technologies, create a few projects to showcase my knowledge in them, and start applying. That could be one way to break into the industry.
Another way would be certificated. Bootcamps, online courses, or in-person courses like university or community colleges. Yes, they say that you don't always need a university degree to get into tech but some kind of education you've gone through that is tech-related e.g. Google courses or the Frontend Dev course that Meta is providing (paid). My colleague completed a computer science degree but he then did a bootcamp and he completed and that's how he landed the job where I work. So even graduates are getting further education. If you can't afford the massive fees, Udemy is a great place to get courses. And don't be shy with the Havard CS50 course videos they have on YouTube - free and you get a certificate free as well!
The advice I give might not work if you haven't identified why after all these years you haven't gotten your foot into the tech industry. This is no way intended to be rude, but if another person who had the same amount of time you studied, and they have gotten a tech job in that time, what makes you different? Goes back to what I said about the things that are holding you back. Some of the reasons are inevitable like health but you need to keep making that effort!
If you need help, you need to ask. Find a mentor or support group. Having someone to guide and encourage you can be incredibly helpful. Look for a mentor or join a support group where you can connect with others who are also learning and growing in tech. You can search for them online, some people offer advice for CV/Resume help or real "getting into tech" advice on places like Fiverr or Upwork or just google for some consultants online. They would cost obviously but if you're really struggling, this might help. After completing bootcamps, they tend to help you get your first job etc so they might be worth considering!
The last bit of advice is do you have a portfolio? No no, like a proper one where you feel confident enough to give to family members, friends, and potential employers? No? Either learn to build one (free of charge) or hire someone to build it for you (costs money) A portfolio is a great way to showcase your skills and projects to potential employers. Even if your projects feel messy or ugly, focus on highlighting what you learned and what you accomplished.
Obviously, I gave hints of advice more towards Frontend Dev because that's what I know more of but you can alter the advice to whatever niche in programming you're into. Remember, breaking into any field takes time and effort. Stay motivated and focused on your goals, and don't be afraid to reach out for help or support when you need it. Good luck!
** I'm not the best at giving advice but I hope this helps đ
#my asks#programming#coding#studying#progblr#codeblr#studyblr#comp sci#tech industry#coding advice#motivation#study motivation#study help#programmer#computer science#tech advice#career#career advice
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Open Door Policy - One Shot
a/n: so, I love a good professor!harry fic, but I donât always love when he gets involved with a student, so y/n is his TA. Heâs 26, and sheâs 23, so not too weird, right? Anyways, this took me a few days to write, and I didnât mean for it to be this long, but here we are. This is a slow burn fam, like...buckle up. Reblogs are always very kind and helpful! Not proofread.Â
Warnings: angst, fluff, and smut!Â
Words: 21.5KÂ
It was Y/Nâs second year in grad school. She knew how to handle her workload on top of still making time for fun. She was still able to go out to the bar, and party with her friends. However, she was serious about her research. She had a âbig girlâ apartment that she shared with two friends, each having their own room. Grad school was expensive, and even though she had a decent job working at the local cafĂ©, it wasnât enough to cover her bills. Luckily, she got a grant to be TA this semester, which was perfect because she was interested in teaching at a collegiate level at some point. Her excitement dwindled slightly when she got the email about what professor sheâd be paired up with.
âWho is it?â Nessa asks, plopping down on the couch with her.
âDr. Styles.â Y/N groans.
âTell me, why is that a problem?â Charlotte asks, coming over with a bowl of popcorn so they could start their movie night. âHeâs so fucking hot.â
âExactly! How am I supposed to concentrate?! I had him my senior year for an elective and it was awful. I was flustered all the time. Heâs such a nice guy too, I missed a class where we had a test and he let me make it up, no questions asked.â
âGreat, so heâs a good professor to learn from.â Nessa says. âOh, maybe youâll get a closer look at some of his tattoos.â
âThereâs nothing to be nervous about, Y/N, heâs only a few years older than us, you know?â Charlotte shrugs. âMaybe youâll fall in love.â She teases her.
âMhm, yeah, because Iâm sure a guy who has his PhD in Computer Science is just dying to go out with a girl whoâs only a TA so she can afford her last year of school.â
âWhat class are you even helping him with? Youâre not specializing in CS.â Nessa says.
âApparently itâs for the section of Web Expressions he teaches, that was the class I took with him. It was really easy, you just learn the basics of HTML and then build your own website.â
âDid you just say that was easy?â Nessa scoffs.
âMy older sister ended up helping me a lot because she had a myspace back in the day, I guess you needed HTML for that.â Y/N shrugs. âItâll be a good experience for me.â
âOkay, but youâre just specializing in Curriculum and Instruction, so-â
âYeah, that involves Instructional Design, so I know about this stuff. Iâm just not looking forward to doing it with him.â She sighs.
âCould be worse.â Charlotte smirks. âYou could have gotten with some old fart who would let you flounder.â
âVery true.â She closes her laptop and sets it on the coffee table. âAlright, letâs get this HSM party started.â
//
A week later Y/N received an email from Dr. Styles to meet with her so they could discuss the class and make sure they were on the same page about the syllabus. She was a nervous wreck. Y/N used to avoid his office like the plague, too afraid to be alone with him. Itâs not that Dr. Styles was a creep or ever put off any inappropriate vibes, he just had this sort of intimidating stare to him. Even when heâd laugh, seeing him soften was intimidating. The sound of his deep, raspy voice was almost a little too soothing, and she was obsessed with his sense of style. His nails were always painted different colors, and he had the cutest pair of round glasses that would sit on the tip of his nose.
Even though it was August, and still very hot out, Y/N wanted to make a good, professional impression. So, she decides on a pair of white slacks that have a tie in the front, a white tank top tucked in, and a navy blue three-quarter sleeve blazer. It was too humid to leave her hair down, so she puts it up in a cute, messy bun. She puts on a little makeup, grabs her laptop bag, and out the door she goes. She puts her sunglasses on immediately, almost getting blinded by the blazing sun.
She had never been in an academic building at this point in the summer. There were a few faculty puttering around, getting their offices situated for the semester. She smiles at a few of them as she takes her sunglasses off. She heads up to the third story where Dr. Stylesâ office was. There was no a/c in this building, but luckily the room theyâd be teaching in would have it due to all the computers.
His door was open, and she nearly walked right by him. She back peddles and already feels weak kneed. He had his glasses on, pushed closer to his face than usual, a small fan on his desk blowing the hair that wasnât in the little sprout on the top of his head back, and he was wearing a white t-shirt.
âUm, Dr. Styles?â She nervously taps on the outside of the doorframe. He looks up from his computer and smiles.
âMiss Y/L/N?â
âYes.â She smiles back at him.
âCome on in, have a seat.â
It was the accent, that fucking British accent that she remembered was the most distracting part about him. He had this drawl to his voice that was irresistible.
âDo you want me to, umâŠâ She points to the door.
âNo, no, too bloody hot to have that thing closed. The little window I get barely opens so I only have this fan to really keep me cool.â He frowns slightly at her appearance. âWhyâd you get so dressed up? You must be sweltering.â Â
âIâm okay!â She blushes, and takes the seat in front of his desk. âI justâŠyou know, wanted to look nice.â His eyebrows raise slightly. âI mean, like, not nice, but professional.â
âWell, donât feel like you need to be dressed up like this all the time. I want you to be comfortable. You donât see me all dressed up.â He smirks.
âYouâre a tenure-track faculty, you can do whatever you want.â
âNot true.â He leans forward and rests his chin on his palm. âI canât call a student an absolute moron when they ask me a stupid question.â
âI thought there were no stupid questions.â She smiles.
âGod, thereâs tons.â He scoffs and sits up straighter. âBut we have to encourage students to speak up when theyâre confused, so.â He shrugs. âAnyways, letâs look at the course, yeah?â
âOkay.â She takes her laptop out and sets it on his desk, scooting closer.
âI added you to the moodle page, so you should have full access to everything. Youâll be grading a bit, so I wanted to make sure you knew how to get in there.â
Once Y/N logs in, and clicks into the course, she smirks.
âWhat?â
âLooks at the exact same.â
âWhat do you mean?â
âI actually, uh, took this class with you a couple of years ago.â She furrows her brows at the page. âYou know, you should really update this, itâs lazy to use the same design year after year.â She sort of says it without thinking and then feels embarrassed when she looks back up to meet his intimidating gaze.
âInteresting, usually Iâm good with namesâŠyours doesnât ring a bell at all.â He looks at his own computer and crosses his arms. âAnd itâs not that Iâm lazy, I donât have a lot of control over the physical design. The assignments are much different, those I keep fresh.â He turns to look at her again. âI also teach eighteen credits worth of courses, I donât exactly have time to sit and revamp all of them.â
âWell, maybe I could do that. Iâve taken a lot of Instructional Design courses.â She says brightly. âStudies show that students do better when their course pages are more inviting.â
âAlright, since youâre the expert, Iâll let you take the lead on that. Can we get back to the material itself? I have to make sure you know what youâre doing.â He squints at her. âYou really took this class?â
âYes.â
âAnd I was your professor?â
âYes, Dr. Styles.â
He plucks his fingers over his lips.
âI feel bad for not remembering you.â
âItâs okay, I sort of kept to myself. You late me retake a test that I missed once, though.â
âOh!â He snaps his fingers. âYou missed class because you had a bad stomach bug.â
âYeah.â She blushes.
âPoor thing, those are the worst when you donât have mum around to help take care of you.â
âItâs alright, I recovered.â
âClearly.â He smiles.
They spend the next hour or so going over the course and the materials. He tells her what heâll need from her specifically. Heâll do most of the teaching, and sheâll bebop around helping students with questions. Oh, and grading, sheâll be helping with a lot of grading. He notices her wipe some sweat from her brow, and he frowns.
âDo you want a water? I have some in the fridge.â
âThat would be great, thank you.â
He wheels over to his mini fridge and tosses her a water bottle. As she takes a sip, she notices him still looking at her.
âYou can take that off, you know?â
âWhat?â
âYour blazer.â
âNo, I canât.â
âWhy not?â
âIâm, uh, only wearing a tank top underneath and I wouldnât feel comfortable being soâŠexposed.â
âOh!â He blushes. âIâm sorry, I hope my comment didnât-â
âItâs fine.â
âI just hope you know I wasnât trying to-â
âI didnât.â She clears her throat. âSo, I have full reigns to redesign some things?â
âSure.â He shrugs. âJust as long as I can still navigate it.â
âIsnât your PhD in Computer Science? You should be fine.â She closes her laptop and sticks it in her bag.
âRightâŠâ He pulls his calendar up on his computer. âWhatâs your class schedule like?â
âWith this one, I only have one other class thatâs in person, the rest are online.â
âPerfect, then it should be easy to build in some office hours for you. Weâll have to share mine, I hope thatâs alright. Not every TA gets their own office, but thereâs plenty of room in here for two. This office actually used to have to people in it, Iâm having a small desk brought in for you.â
âOh, um, thanks. I also work a lot at the cafĂ© down town, but it shouldnât be a problem.â
âYou work at Bentoâs?â
âYeah.â
âI go there all the time, how have I not seen you?â
âI work in the back as a baker.â
âOh cool, I actually worked in a bakery when I was younger.â
âI know.â She rolls her eyes. âYou used to mention it all the time in class.â
âI did?â
âYes.â She chuckles. âYou made it sound like so much fun itâs actually what made me apply to Bentoâs in the first place.â
âAh, well, glad I could help.â
They decide on the office hours that will work best, and then he dismisses her. Just as sheâs about to leave, he says her name.
âYeah?â
âWhen itâs just us feel free to call me Harry. You and I donât need to be so formal, alright?â
âOkay.â She smiles. âSee you next week.â
The second she gets outside the building, she rips her blazer off. She gets back to her apartment as quickly as possible, changes into a bathing suit, and gets in the pool outside. Charlotte and Nessa were already out there, sitting on chairs in the shade. Y/N gets out and towels off, sitting down with them.
âNeeded to cool off after your time with Dr. Styles, huh?â Charlotte winks at her.
âShut up.â Y/N nudges her friend. âIt was so fucking hot in his office. I know itâll cool down eventually, and I was also way overdressed. He only had a t-shirt and jeans on.â
âDid he remember you?â Nessa asks.
âNot at first, but of course he remembered the reason I missed class was because I had a stomach bug, how embarrassing.â
âWhy is that embarrassing?â Charlotte asks.
âI donât want him to think about me being allâŠicky.â
âDo you seriously still have a crush on him?â Nessa asks.
âItâs not a crush, heâs just insanely attractive. He looked so cute being all casual today.â She whines. âIt doesnât matter, heâs twenty-six and probably has a girlfriend or something, how could he not?â
âI donât know, I wouldnât wanna date a guy smarter than me. He probably man-splains all the time.â Charlotte says. âI bet heâs good for a quick fuck, and thatâs about it.â
âI guess Y/N will find out.â Nessa giggles.
âYou two are the worst.â She groans.
//
âHey, Y/N!â
Y/N was in the back at Bentoâs getting some bread proofed and ready for the morning crew. One of her coworkers was calling for her.
âYeah?â
âThereâs some guy out front asking for you?â
âWhat?â She wipes her hands on her apron and walks out front. She freezes when she sees Harry. She had a hairnet on, her face was laced with sweat, and she smelled like bread, which you would think would smell good, but it doesnât. It had been a couple of days since their meeting.
âSorry, had to see it for myself.â He smirks.
âSee what, Dr. Styles?â She walks around the counter to speak with him.
âHarry.â He corrects her. âSee you in action, of course.â He takes a sip from his drink. âI see youâve already made some changes to the course.â
âYeah, uh, it was pretty easy.â
âWell, it looks fantastic. I was going to email you, but I was stopping in here and I thought Iâd see if you were working so I could just tell you in person.â
âOh.â She blushes. âThank you, that means a lot.â
âWell, Iâll let you get back to it. Donât wanna get you in trouble.â He waves as he leaves, and she stands there stunned.
âWho the fuck was that?â Her coworker asks.
âUm, Iâm his TA this semester. He wanted to tell me I did a good job on something.â
âOh, shit.â
âWhat?â
âHeâs gonna fuck you.â
âStop!â She swats her hand at them. âGo take drink orders, Iâm going back to the proofer.â
Harry was just being nice, and maybe he was looking for a good laugh. She shakes the thought from her head, he didnât want to fuck her. He was way more professional than that.
//
On her first day as a TA, she decided on a pair of jean capris, and a light blouse. She left her hair down since it wasnât humid. She felt more like herself, which was good. She goes to her now shared office with Harry first, just to drop her things off.
âGood morning.â She says shyly as she comes in. The small desk he had brought in for her was there, and there was a small plant waiting for her on it.
âMorning, Y/N, are you excited?â
âMore so nervous, but yeah. Whatâs this?â She points to the plant.
âGot you a little something for your desk. Itâs really easy to take care of, should only need water once a week.â
âOh, thank you.â She tucks some hair behind her ear and sits down.
âSince itâs syllabus week, today will be really easy. Weâll go over a few things and then Iâll probably let them go early.â
âAlright.â
âIâll give you a couple of minutes to introduce yourself too.â
âOkay.â
âDo you have a water bottle with you or anything?â
âYeah, right here.â She takes it out of her bag.
âGreat, a little trick I learned when I first started teaching is that sometimes you can end up answering a question you ask the students because youâre so nervous when no one answers right away. So, if you take a moment to take a sip of your water it gives them more time to speak up.â
âThanks, thatâs a really good tip.â
âYouâll do great.â He looks down at his watch. âCome on, we should head to the classroom, make sure all the computers are working.â
Y/N nods and follows him out. Her eyes drift down to how his butt looks in his khakis. He had a simple green t-shirt tucked into them. He was effortlessly handsome. The cool of the a/c in the computer lab helps snap her out of ogling. After they check the rows of computers, only one wasnât working, so Y/N takes a DO NOT USE sign onto it.
âBrilliant.â He says to her.
Students start trickling in, and choosing their seats. The class was mostly boys, and only a couple of girls. Unfortunately, that was typical for courses like this, even if it was just a gen ed that literally anyone could take.
âMorning everyone, Iâm Dr. Styles, and Iâd prefer you call me that. I worked a long time to be called that, so please donât call me by my first name. You can call me professor, though, if you feel comfortable.â He smiles at the class. âWeâre very lucky this semester, I have a TA that will be able to help you with assignments.â He gestures to Y/N.â
âHi, yeah, my nameâs Y/N, you can feel free to just call me that. Um, Iâm in my second year of grad school. Iâm studying curriculum and instructional design. Iâm excited to be with you all this semester.â
Y/N takes a seat to the side of the room while Harry pulls up the course and the syllabus on the projector.
âNow, who here is a CS major?â Most of the class raises their hand. âRight, try branching out for your gen eds, your eyes will bleed if you donât.â He jokes. âWhat about those of you who arenât CS, just shout it out.â
âCommunication.â
âUndecided.â
âIT.â
âPsychology.â
âWonderful, glad weâll have a little bit of variety. Y/N redesigned this class, so Iâm hoping youâll appreciate what sheâs done to make things easier for you.â
Y/N takes attendance, and then sits back down so Harry can go over the syllabus and explain some of the more intricate assignments. He also explains his door is always open for anyone that needs extra help. He wanted to make a good impression since he knew some of the students would end up in some of his higher level courses.
âPlease take some time to go over some of the basic codes and short cuts weâll be using quite a bit. For our next class weâre going to work on a site together, alright?â Thereâs a hum of agreement throughout the class. âGreat, and just so you know, Y/N will be doing the majority of the grading, so itâs not my good side youâll want to be on, itâs hers.â He grins. âAlright, youâre all dismissed, enjoy the nice weather.â
Everyone files out, and Y/N takes a deep breath. She walks with Harry down to his office and she plops down in her seat.
âSeems like itâll be a good group.â He opens one of his drawers. âHere, forgot to give you a key. You can come here whenever you want, feel free to do your homework if thereâs nothing to be graded.â
âThanks.â She takes it from him and puts it on her key ring. âItâll be nice to have a quiet space, actually. One of my roommates is getting her masterâs in theater education, and my other roommate is getting her masterâs in music education, so it gets kind loud from time to time.â
âThen definitely come here anytime you like.â He smiles and sits in his chair.
âWhen does your next class start?â
âIâve got about an hour or so before I need to go back to the computer lab for my computing fundamentals class. I teach two sections of that back to back. Then thatâs it for today.â
âDoes it get annoying to teach the same class back to back?â
âNot really.â He shrugs. âIâm used to it by now anyways.â
âDr. Styles?â A female student taps on the outside of the door. âHow was your suâŠoh, youâre in here with someone.â She frowns.
âI sure am, Melanie.â Harry seems to look a little nervous. âIâll be rather busy today, but we can catch up soon, alright?â
âOh, okay.â She glares at Y/N before leaving. Harry sighs heavily once sheâs gone.
âThatâs one of my frequent flyers.â He rolls his eyes. âHer and a couple other girls try to come by and chatâŠâ He runs a hand through his hair. âIâm actually kind of glad youâll be around, Iâve seen her fly out of here so fast.â
âDoes sheâŠhave a crush on you or something?â
âIâm afraid so.â Harry sighs. âItâs partly why I keep my door open when I meet with students. I used to keep it closed to have some privacy, cause sometimes thereâs personal things students want to talk about, but she came in last yearâŠI donât know, I just keep my door open now.â
âThat sucks.â She turns to her laptop to start getting some work done. âSuch is the life of the hot, young professor, unfortunately.â Once again, Y/N said something without really thinking about it. She really needs to work on a filter. When she turns around to look at him to apologize, he was looking at her, face flushed. âIâm sorry, I just meant-â
âI have some emails to catch up on, so Iâm gonna put by earbuds in and just focus on that.â
Y/N nods and turns back to her computer. She sighs heavily. The last thing she wanted to do was make the poor guy feel more tense than he already did. It must be painfully awkward to have students throwing themselves at you all the time, and whatâs worse is that he feels so uncomfortable that he feels like he canât even close his door. Y/N wanted to know what exactly Melanie did. It couldnât have been so bad because she was still coming by to see him. Maybe Harry just picked up on a vibe, and got ahead of the problem before it got worse.
Forty or so minutes later, Harry tells Y/N heâs off to class, but she can feel free to stay if she wanted. She smiles and continues working on a paper she already had assigned for one of her courses. It was really nice to just have a space to work.
âDrâŠohâŠis this not Dr. Stylesâ office anymore.â The girl standing in the doorway frowns.
âOh! No, it is. Heâs teaching right now. Iâm his TA, Y/N, so weâre sharing. Can I help you with anything?â
âNo, um, I was just coming to say hi, but Iâll catch him later.â
âWhatâs your name? I can tell him you stopped by, then he can email you or something.â
âItâs Bridget, and he doesnât need to email me. I was just coming to say hi and chat about summer.â She sighs. âSorry to bother you.â
Before Y/N can say it wasnât a bother, the girl is gone. Harry really seemed to have a fan club so far. Y/N had professors she loved, but it was the first day of classes, she never went around trying to catch up with them. She decides to close the door a bit, maybe if people came by they would just assume he wasnât there.
Y/Nâs eyes start to feel droopy. It hits her that sheâs been up since four this morning, having pulled an early shift at Bentoâs. She decides to cross her arms on her desk, and rest her head on them. Her music was playing softly in the background, and her eyes eventually flutter closed.
Harry comes back from his second section of Computer Fundamentals and is confused when he sees his door only open a crack. He opens it the rest of the way and stops short when he sees Y/N resting peacefully. He wonders how long sheâs been asleep for. He didnât want her to be too groggy. He also knew some students from his previous classes may stop by for some clarification, so as he much he didnât want to, he had to wake her up.
âY/N?â He says softly, tapping her on the shoulder.
âMm?â She grunts.
âGotta wake up, love.â
Her eyes snap open. She sits up and watches him as he sits at his desk, pulling some papers out of his bag. She knew it was a pet name often used where he was from, but holy mother of God did it sound good hearing him call her that.
âSorry, IâŠoh wow, I slept for way too long.â
âYou didnât seem so tired this morning, are you feeling alright?â
âOh yeah, Iâm fine. I worked an early shift at the bakery this morning, so it must just be catching up with me.â She stretches her arms out. âI think Iâm gonna head out now. Oh, some student named Bridget came by earlier, but you were in class.â
âAlright.â He sighs. âThanks, see you Wednesday.â
âSee you Wednesday.â She smiles, gathers her things, and heads out.
//
At the end of the first week of classes, Harry was exhausted. It was always like this by the time that first Friday hit. The faculty meeting was the most draining part of it. He didnât subject Y/N to it since she wasnât helping with a major course. He had whined about it in front of her, though, so when he got back to his office he found a cupcake from Bentoâs waiting for him.
It took a couple of weeks, but Y/N was able to relax around Harry. He noticed this right away. She was way less nervous, and he felt happy knowing he wasnât making her feel intimidated. He was also happy for the help. She was able to field a lot of questions for the students, and her grading things was already saving him a ton of time.
The semester was off to a great start. Y/N would often bring Harry extra pastries from Bentoâs, and he would praise her for how good they tasted.
âIf those whole Instructional Design thing doesnât work out, you should just open up your own bakery.â Is what he would often say after stuffing his face. It would make her giggle and blush. She enjoyed pleasing him.
They were having a peaceful Tuesday afternoon, holding office hours. Mostly working on their own, but occasionally chatting. Well, it was peaceful, until someone walked through the door.
âHarry.â An angry woman holding a small shih tzu and a large bag says. âI canât take care of him Max anymore. Iâm moving and my new place canât have pets.â
âKelly, letâs go out into the hall, yeah?â
She looks over at Y/N, who was stunned. Harry was standing up and walking around his desk to lead the woman out, but she wonât budge.
âMake whoever this is leave, you have an office for a reason.â
âI donât have an office for personal matters, come on.â He takes the dog, Max, from her and cuddles him to his chest. Harry gets a lick to his chin. âAw, you miss Daddy, Maxy?â
The woman rolls her eyes, and lets Harry lead her into the hallway. Y/N hears some muffled discussion, the woman raising her voice more than him.
âYou could have looked for a place that allowed pets. This is so typical of you. You fought me on keeping him, and the second it got difficult you wanna just dump him with me.â
âIâm never home, Harry! Itâs not fair to him.â
âAnd you think Iâm home more?â
âMore than me.â She scoffs. âYou donât have a choice, I leave at the end of the week.â
âYou donât even look like youâre going to miss him.â
âI thought I wanted him, but every time I looked at him I just thought of you, and now I canât stand him. Iâm moving to have a fresh start. Whatever happens to him is up to you now.â She drops the large bag full of Maxâs things at his feet and walks away.
Harry sighs and kisses the top of Maxâs head. He leans down to grab the bag and walks back into his office.
âIâm so sorry you had to see that.â
âItâs okay.â She extends her hands out. âCan I hold him? Heâs so cute.â She pouts.
âUm, sure.â Harry hands Max over to Y/N.
âOh my goodness.â She gets a lick on her cheek. âHow old is he?â
âA little over a year.â Harry mumbles as he goes through the bag. âI have no idea how Iâm going to make this work. I canât bring him with me every day, itâs not allowed. Once in a while is fine, but itâs not like heâs a therapy dog.â
âI can help! My apartment is pet friendly for small dogs. I could just meet you here and you can drop him off to me.â
âI couldnât ask you to do that. You have so much going on between this, your own school work, and Bentoâs.â
âI really wouldnât mind, I know you end up staying here late a lot of the time, I could take him for walks and stuff, tire him out so you can just have a snuggle with him when you get home.â She holds him up to her face. Lucky dog, she thinks to herself.
âYouâre my TA, Y/N, not my dog sitter.â He sighs. âIâm sure I could find another student that needs some extra cash-â
âWouldnât need to pay me.â She smiles. âPlease, heâs so cute, I really wanna help. It wonât stress me out, I promise.â
âWeâll see, it would only be on my busy days.â He takes Max back from her, and pulls his dog bed from the bag. âGo on, get comfy.â He sets him down and pats the top of his head. He takes out his water bowl and pours some into it for him.
âFeel free to not answer, but who was she?â
âMy exâŠâ Harry sighs and runs a hand through his hair. He sits down and watches Max lap up at his water bowl. âShe insisted on a small dog because theyâre easier to take care of.â He rolls his eyes. âBut I missed him a lot, so Iâm not complaining. We were together a couple of years, lived together for a bit, thought it would be smart to get a dog like a lot of people do when theyâre getting more serious. But we started fighting a lot, we both got busier, neither of us wanted to compromise, and so it goes. She took him with her. We both got new places and have barely spoken.â
âIâm so sorry.â
âItâs okay, we werenât right for each other, and he sort of made us realize that.â Max yips at Harry. âThatâs right, buddy.â Harry chuckles. âWe called it quits roughly six months ago, itâs all good now. I thought Iâd miss her, but I missed him more.â
âI get that, I dated this guy for a bit in undergrad, but I definitely didnât see it lasting.â She rolls her eyes.
âGuys at that age are really immature, anyways. Youâve got plenty of time to meet someone.â He turns back to his computer and gets back into his emails. He looks over his calendar and groans. âAlright, Iâll definitely need your help with him.â He turns back to her. âI give a lecture on Thursday evenings, so no one would be home with him literally day.â
âNo problem at all, I can bring him home with me and I can just drop him off to you.â She smiles. âMy roommates love dogs too, theyâll be excited.â
âIâll need your phone number, just to get updates and stuff, itâll be easier than email.â
âSure!â She hands him her phone immediately. âFeels silly to not have exchanged numbers sooner.â
âWas sort of trying to keep a level of professionalism between us, but I suppose youâre gonna be helping me with my pup youâll be more than just a colleague.â He puts his number in and texts himself. âYouâre sure this wonât be too much for you?â
âNot at all.â
âAt least let me pay you.â
âNo way.â
âY/N.â He sighs. âIâm gonna pay you, just deal with it, alright?â There was that intimidating side of him again. Y/N just swallows and nods. âGood.â
//
Nessa and Charlotte loved when Y/N would bring Max home with her. They teased her a bit at first because it was like her and Harry now owned this dog together, but she explained she was just helping him out.
âAt least now you know for sure heâs single, and that heâs not afraid of commitment.â Nessa winks.
âOh stop.â Y/N nudges her.
âHe has your number now, does he ever text you about anything other than Max?â
âNot really, although heâll send a funny gif as a response sometimes. Heâs got a good sense of humor. You should see him in class.â Y/Nâs phone buzzes and sees a text from Harry. âSpeak of the Devil.â
Harry: Iâm running late tonight, Iâm so sorry. Would it be too much to ask to have you just get him settled at my place? Thereâs a spare key in the plant by the door.
Y/Nâs eyes grow wide.
âOh my god, he wants me to bring Max to his house tonight.â
âItâs happening!â Charlotte squeals. âHave you eaten much pineapple lately?â
âWould you shut up?! He doesnât want to fuck me. Heâs way too professional.â
Y/N: of course!
Harry: youâre a lifesaver. Iâve got some frozen pizza, feel free to make yourself at home until I get in. I wonât have you waiting too long.
âOh wow, Iâm gonna be there until he gets inâŠâ She looks at her friends. âMaybe Iâll go shave my legs, you know, just in case.â
//
Y/N finds the key quickly, and walks into Harryâs home. He didnât live too far from campus. He had a nice town home. Max scamps inside and immediately goes over to his toys in the living room. Y/N takes her shoes off and leaves them in the mudroom. Harry kept his home clean, and it made Y/N smile. There were some papers on his kitchen table that had grade marks on them. She wondered if he had a home office or not.
She goes into his freezer to find the pizza, and preheats the over. Once the pizza is baking, she plops onto the couch, pulling Max into her lap and turning the TV on. He has Netflix, so she click into that. She pouts when she sees he watches a lot of Rom Coms, it was too cute. She puts on The Office and has a slice of pizza. She didnât need to work until tomorrow afternoon, so she didnât mind that it was getting to be a little later on a Thursday, and it wasnât like she went to raging parties anymore either.
Eventually, she dozed off. She couldnât help it. Harry had a really comfortable couch, and plush blanket to curl up in, and Max was just as cozy to sleep with. Harry had texted Y/N, but she didnât answer because she was asleep. The lecture he had ran late, and then he had to meet with some students to help them. Not to mention it was raining heavily, and he needed to drive a little slower than usual. So he didnât pull into his driveway until 10PM. He sighs, feeling terrible that Y/N was still there.
He quietly enters his home, but it didnât matter because Max hears him, wakes up, and starts barking. This startles Y/N awake.
âShh, Max, itâs just Daddy.â He scoops him up and walks into the living room. Y/N was rubbing her eyes, trying to wake up. âIâm so sorry, I-â
âItâs okay.â She yawns. âI wrapped up the pizza and put it in the fridge for you.â
âOh, um, thank you. Think Iâm about to pass out though.â
âDonât be silly.â She gets up and stretches. âYou need to eat something.â
She brushes by him to go into his kitchen and take the pizza out. She puts a paper-towel over it and pops it in the microwave.
âI really am sorry youâre here so late.â
âItâs okay.â She leans against the counter. âWhatâs the lecture for, anyways?â
âItâs actually a graduate level CS systems course. I couldnât turn the money down when they offered it to me. I figured since itâs only once a week it would be terrible, and itâs not, itâs just exhausting.â
The microwave beeps, and Y/N take the plate out for him, removing the paper towel.
âSee, now itâs not all dried out.â She smiles.
âNeat trick, Iâll have to remember that.â The rain taps violently on the window in the kitchen.
âYikes, I didnât even know it was supposed to rain tonight. It wasnât like this when I drove over.â She bites her bottom lip and looks outside.
Harry finishes his pizza and puts the plate in the sink. He sets Max down and he runs upstairs to his dog bed in Harryâs room.
âListen, uh, if you want I can set up the pull out for you. Or I could sleep on it and you could take my bedâŠif you donât feel safe driving home.â
âOh, I couldnât take your bed.â She turns to him. âBut I may take your couch. I was sleeping on it fine as is, no need to set it up.â
âWell, let me at least get you a proper pillow and something to change into, yeah?â
âOkay.â
âRight, um, well you know where the bathroom down here is, feel free to use whatever to wash up. Iâll run up to grab what you need, be down in a sec.â
Harry changes into his own pjâs, and finds some spare pants and a t-shirt for Y/N. Heâs even able to find a spare toothbrush. He hustles back down and seeâs Y/N bending over to charge her phone using the plug behind the tide table next to the couch. Harry clears his throat to get her attention.
âHere, you can wear this, and heâs a toothbrush.â
âThanks for letting crash here, I get nervous driving at night when itâs like that outside.â
âItâs the least I could do, you gave up your Thursday night toâŠâ He looks at the TV screen and his cheeks grow hot. Y/N looks over at the TV as well and wonders why The Office might embarrass him.
âIs it okay that I used your Netflix?â
âYeah, IâŠgod, itâs just, youâve seen what I watch.â He rubs the back of his neck.
âI didnât snoop or anything, promise.â She smiles and takes the clothes and toothbrush from him.
He opens up the coffee table to take out a pillow and another blanket.
âWell, Iâll be right upstairs if you need anythingâŠum, goodnight.â
âGoodnight, Harry.â
She wanted to ask if he wanted to watch a little TV with her, but he looked so tired. She lays on the couch after getting changed. His bed clothes swam on her, and she loved it. They smelled just like him and it made her smile. She texts in the group chat so the girls know whatâs up. They tell her just to go crawl into his bed, and she rolls her eyes. She falls back asleep after another couple of episodes of The Office.
The next morning, her eyes flutter open when the light from the sliding door in the living room hit her. She hears Harry shuffling around upstairs.
âGotta be quiet, Max. Y/N is sleeping.â She hears him whisper and it makes her smile. She decides to pretend to be asleep as to not rile the dog up.
She hears the door open and close, and thatâs when she knows Harryâs gone to take Max for a walk. She gets up and folds the blankets, and puts the pillow on top. She figures heâll want to wash it. She goes into the bathroom to do her business, but doesnât change just yet, she didnât want to leave the comfort of his clothes. She does, however, put her bra on. She didnât want to bounce around and make him uncomfortable.
Harry comes back in with a beanie on, cover the beautiful curls Y/N adored so much. He was wearing grey joggers, and a black t-shirt. Max runs right over to Y/N.
âMorning.â Harry says.
âMorning.â She pats Maxâs head.
âSleep alright?â
âMhm, thank you.â
âIâm gonna make some breakfast, you hungry?â
âSure, I could eat.â She smiles.
He smiles back and opens up the fridge. Y/N grabs the dog food and gets Maxâs bowl filled. She sees Harry starting up the coffee pot, and then going back to the fridge for eggs.
âEggs and toast alright?â
âSounds great.â
Harry gets a pan heated up and cracks four eggs into it.
âYou working at Bentoâs today?â
âYeah, not until this afternoon though, no worries.â
âOh good, I would have felt bad if I was keeping you.â
âYouâre not.â She sits up on the counter and watches him cook the eggs. He moves to the toaster and puts for pieces of bread in. âThis is a nice place.â
âThanks, sort of found it in a scramble, but it gets the job done. Would have liked more than one bedroom, but oh well.â Harry flips all of the eggs over so theyâll be sunny side down. âWant cheese?â
âYes, please.â She hops off the counter to grab a couple of mugs for the coffee.
âI have to apologize, I donât have any cream for that.â
âSugar?â
He slides the sugar bowl down to her and she smiles. Once everything is done they sit down at the kitchen table.
âMm, this is delicious, thank you.â
âSâjust a fried egg.â He chuckles. âBut Iâm glad you like it.â
âDo you have to go to campus today?â
âNot technically, but I will just to get some work done. Iâll bring Max with me. He likes the little dog bed Iâve put under my desk.â
âHeâs really such a love bug. Snuggled with me last night and everything. My roommates love him too.â
âYouâve been such a big help in so many ways. Donât know what Iâll do without you next semester.â
âIâm applying for more TA positions, maybe theyâll stick me with you again.â
âWouldnât you want more experience with a different class?â
âIt doesnât really matter.â She shrugs. âIt would be cool to work with you over winter break to redesign your other courses.â
âMan, if I didnât have to do that myselfâŠhm, maybe I could put a good word in. That is, if you donât mind being stuck with me again.â
âStuck with you? Hello, this is going way better than I thought. I was sort of nervous to be your TA at first.â
âYou were?â He frowns.
âYouâre a little intimidating.â
âI donât mean to be.â
âI know, itâs just the way you come off sometimes. Youâre hilarious when you want to be.â
âThanks.â He smirks and continues to eat. He looks at her and furrows his brows. âFeel free to keep those.â
âWhat?â
âThe clothes I let you borrow, feel free to just keep âem if you want. I donât much wear those pants anymore, and I have a dozen t-shirts.â
âOh, um, thank you. Might take you up on that, Iâm pretty cozy.â
She helps clean up the dishes and then gathers her things. He walks her out to her car.
âThanks again for watching him.â
âOf course, Iâll see you Monday morning.â
âSee you, have a good weekend, love.â
Her heart skips a beat as he turns and walks back inside. She takes a deep breath as she gets into her car. It was cloudy on the drive home, but at least it wasnât raining. The second she gets through the door Nessa and Charlotte grill her for details, and they were highly disappointed that the only thing they shared was breakfast.
âIt was really domestic, though, it was nice.â Y/N explains. âHe was so cute while he made me breakfast. Heâs so kind. He even let me keep his clothes, and he wants me to be his TA again next semester. He literally said he wouldnât know what to do without me.â
âYeah, because youâve volunteered to do everything for him except suck his dick.â Charlotte scoffs. âYou said heâs been broken up for a little over six months right? Do you think heâs gotten his dick wet since then?â
âCharlotte!â Y/N giggles. âHeâs a grown man, he can do what he wants. I bet he has, he easily could have had a rebound, although, he seems really respectful, so who knows if heâs even into hooking up.â
âRight, like when you told us he always keeps his office door open.â
âI feel bad, Iâm there when some of those girls come to chat with him, and you can tell they just make him uncomfortable.â She shakes her head. âI think he and I are, like, friends now. I like what we have going, Iâm not going to rock the boat. It could really complicate things.â
âSo, would you say now that youâve gotten to know him better your crush is lessâŠapparent?â Nessa asks.
âGod no! We mesh really well, we think a lot of the same things are funnyâŠâ She wines slightly. âItâs truly unfair.â She sighs. âRight person, wrong time.â
//
It was hard to stay awake during your shift at the bakery, but you made it through. You were thankful you only needed to be there until about dinner time. You had to be back in Saturday morning for open, but that didnât stop you and your friends from going out to the bar for a couple of drinks.
It gave the three of you time to catch up and complain about coursework. Nessa was directing a production at the university, and she still had students who werenât off-book, and Charlotte had to deal with pretentious music bros who really liked to man-splain the music industry to her. Y/N felt lucky that the majority of her classes were online.
âOkay, I have to ask, are there any students in class you think have crushes on each other?â Nessa asks her, sipping from her straw.
âOh, for sure. There are these two boys, they donât sit next to each other, but you can tell theyâre friends. One of them always looks behind to the other so they can make a face. Itâs too cute.â
They were at a more adult bar tonight. Itâs not that they didnât like the college bars they were so used to going to, but if they went there then that meant getting shitfaced and staying on the dancefloor until close. It also made things awkward when running into students. So the three of them felt safe here, they could really relax.
âOh my fucking god.â Charlotte says. âDr. Styles just walked in, and fuck, heâs here with a couple of really hot guys.â
âWhat?!â Y/N was buzzed, and she didnât want Harry to see her like this. She wanted his image of her to remain sweet and professional. She peers over her shoulder to look at him, and her eyes widen.
He wasnât wearing his glasses, he had a floral patterned shirt on that had the first few buttons undone, and a pair of black jeans to match. They werenât skinny jeans or anything, but they sure as fuck were working for him. Both of his friends were a little shorter, but both equally as handsome. The three walk right by the bar and grab a booth.
âThis is bad.â Y/N groans. âHe looks so fucking good.â
âWho knew he was so tatted up?!â Nessa says. âI thought it was just his arms, but did you see his collar bones? We love a man who has going attire.â
The bar was starting to get more crowded, and louder as it got later. Music was blaring from the speakers, but all Y/N could think about was Harry. She wondered if he would venture to her area of the bar to order his drinks. One of his friends went up first, on Nessaâs left.
âHey, Niall, what can I get for you?â The bartender asks him.
âBradly, so good to see yeh, Iâll take a pint of Guinness, Louâs gonna have a pale ale, and Harryâll have a Corona with lime.â
âYou got it.â
Niall drums his fingers on the bar. Nessa was sweating. She had a boyfriend, so she would never do anything, but fuck, that Irish accent tore right through her. Niall looks over at the three girls who had all fallen silent after he approached. He makes eye contact with Y/N, and they share a smile.
âOpening a tab tonight?â
âYeah, one of those nights for sure. Poor Harryâs had a run in with his ex, basically dropped their dog in his lap and left. Itâs been a couple of weeks since it happened, but itâs been eatinâ the lad up.â
Bradly nods and takes Niallâs credit card to keep on the back of the bar. He hands him the three beers, and Niall thanks him. The girls try not to watch as he sits down.
âHoly shit, I thought I was going to crap my pants.â Nessa breathes. âI love Andy, donât get me wrong, but holy fuck.â She shakes her head. âI may need to have him pick me up from here tonight.â She giggles.
âNow I almost wish there was dancing here. Wouldnât mind showing that guy how well I can pop my ass.â Charlotte laughs.
âHe smiled at me, did you see it? Of course Harry surrounds himself with other beautiful people.â She pouts.
Niall slides Harry and Louis their beers and they all clink their glasses.
âIâm so glad we could all get out to do this. Sorry we didnât rescue you the second Kelly showed up.â Louis says.
âItâs alright, I appreciate you guys coming tonight.â
âIs Max okay for a bit on his own?â Niall asks.
âYeah, I put the gates up for him so he canât mess much up. I wouldnât have texted my TA to see if she could watch him again, butâŠâ
âBut youâll most likely be fucking someone tonight.â Niall grins. âSurprised you didnât just fuck her, she stayed at your place and everything.â
âActually, you asshole,â Harry chuckles and takes a swig of his beer. âI was going to say that I would have felt bad taking up another one of her evenings. I donât know if Iâm in the mood to take anyone home tonight.â
âToo bad, girls love little dogs like Max.â Louis shrugs.
âThereâs three really hot girls sitting by the bar.â Niall loves over at the three girls. âOne for each of us if we play our cards right.â
Harryâs back was turned away from the bar, so he couldnât see who Niall was talking about.
âThey could be college students.â Louis says.
âNot at this place. The undergrads donât come here.â Harry says. âMostly grad students or other faculty that live close by, locals too.â
âWe could order their next round of drinks, and then invite them to come sit with us. Booth has plenty of room.â Niall suggest.
Harry and Louis turn around slightly to get a look at the girls Niall was talking about. Harry nearly chokes on his Corona, and turns back around.
âJesus, are you alright?â Louis asks, patting his back.
âYeah, yeah Iâm fine. We canât get those girls drinks.â
âWhy not?â
âThe one on the right is my TA, Y/N, and her two roommates. I know one of them has a boyfriendâŠuhâŠthe one on the very left. The middle one is single, but even still, I donât think that would be a good idea.â
âMate, youâre TA is that good looking, and you didnât even try to fuck her when she stayed at your place?â Niall asks.
âNo, I didnât try to fuck her. Iâm doing this thing where I donât fuck people I have a position of power over.â He rolls his eyes. âThatâs a no go.â
âBut if she wasnât your TA, and just a regular grad studentâŠ?â Louis raises an eyebrow at Harry. He runs a hand through his hair as thinks it over.
âI donât know, I havenât really thought about it. I mean, sheâs obviously cute, butâŠI could never do something like that.â
âItâs not like sheâs going to be your TA next semester, you could-â Harry cuts Niall off.
âActually, she might be. I have a meeting with the curriculum committee to discuss what Iâll need help with for next semester, and we both want to work with each other again. Crossing that line would complicate things, not to mention itâs highly unprofessional.â
âItâs not like sheâs a student sitting in one of your classes, then Iâd agree with you. Youâre colleagues, technically. Nothing in the rule book saying you canât fuck a colleague.â Niall says.
âHeâs got a point, Har.â Louis says.
âEven if I agreed with the both of you, Iâd still be taking advantage. I think she has a little crush on me, sheâs made a couple flirty comments here and thereâŠâ
âNot to mention she jumped at the chance to help watch your dog.â Louis says.
âItâs not happening.â
âWell, you may not want to fuck a pretty girl tonight, but I do, and if the middle one is single, perhaps Iâll still order them all drinks, and just talk with her. Or, if youâre saying Y/Nâs a no go for you, maybe Iâll chat her up. We smiled at each other, maybe she thinks Iâm cute.â Niall grins.
âDonât you dare.â He glares at him, finishing his beer. âI donât care if you talk to, fuck whatâs her nameâŠCharlotte! I donât care if you talk to Charlotte, but donât try anything with Y/N.â He looks at Louis. âYou either.â
âNot that I would, but basically youâre saying if you canât fuck her no one else can?â Louis asks.
âI just wouldnât feel comfortable with it.â
âAlright.â Niall shrugs. âWe ready for the next round, then?â They both nod at him, and Niall brings the empties up to the bar. The girls fall silent when he approaches again. âHi there, is there a reason you all keep doing that?â
The girls all turn to look at him. They were sweating.
âDoing what?â Charlotte asks nervously.
âWell, and maybe itâs just a coincidence, but you keep getting quiet when I come over.â
âItâs justâŠumâŠâ Nessa starts. âYouâre here with someone our friend knows.â She points to Y/N. âIn a professional setting, and weâre just surprised to see him out, thatâs all.â
âOh, am I? Who is it?â
âDr. Styles.â Y/N speaks up. Niall smiles as his eyes raise.
âDr. Styles, how formal.â He looks over at Bradly who gives him the new drinks. âBradly, do me a favor, put these ladiesâ next round on my tab, will you?â
âYou donât have to do that.â Y/N says.
âWhether you know my friend or not, Iâd be a real jerk to not buy three beautiful girls a drink, wouldnât I?â He winks at Charlotte as he walks away with his new drinks.
âHe winked at me, oh my god.â She squeals. âY/N, you wouldnât care if I tried to fuck one of Harryâs friends, right? Itâs been a minute for me.â She pouts.
âNo, why would I care?â She laughs. Bradly gives the girls their new drinks. âThat was really nice of him.â She twists her straw and looks over at the booth. She can see Niall and the other guy laughing, while Harry just shakes his head.
âWhat the fuck did you say to them?â Harry asks as he takes a sip of beer.
âWould you relax? They simply mentioned that they knew you, and I bought their next round, that was it.â
âGreat, so she knows Iâm here.â He groans. âMove.â He says to Louis.
âWhy?â
âBecause now I have to go talk to her.â
âOh, you do?â Louis smirks.
âYes, do you know how fucking rude it would be not even say hello?â
âI donât see her coming over here.â Niall says.
âSheâs obviously nervous!â Harry takes a large gulp of his drink. âMove, Lou.â
Louis gets up so Harry can get out of the booth.
âOh my god, Y/N, Harryâs coming over here.â Nessa says.
âShut up,  no heâs not, oh my god, he is, holy shit. IâmâŠinebriated.â
The girls laugh at her as Harry comes to sit on the open stool next to Y/N. He gets comfortable before he looks at her and smiles. She slowly turns herself to look at him.
âHi.â He says.
âHi.â
âDid my friend bother you?â
âNot at allâŠhe was very nice.â
Harry nods and sips from his drink.
âI didnât know you came hereâŠâ He says.
âCould say the same to you.â She looks him up and down. âBarely recognized you when you walked in. Thatâs a nice shirt.â
âThanks.â He blushes and wants to kick himself for being so exposed to her.
âYou havenât met my friends yet. Charlotte, Nessa, this is DrâŠuh, this is Harry.â The girls both say hello.
âHi, Iâve heard a lot about you both. Youâre Charlotte right?â
âYeah.â
âMy friend thinks youâre cute.â He nods over to Niall. Maybe Harry wouldnât have been so bold, but he knew they were only a few years apart in age, so it wasnât totally weird, and he had a couple drinks in him, so thereâs that.
âReally?!â
âMhm.â
âShould I go talk to him?â
âDefinitely, I think heâd really like that.â
âGood enough for me.â She hops off the stool. âNess, come talk to his other friend with me itâs not awkward.â
âWing-man to the rescue, Iâm on it.â
âYou guys!â Y/N calls after them, but theyâre already sitting down. She looks back at Harry and squints at him.
âWhat?â
âDid you do that on purpose?â
âDo what?â
âGet them to leave so we could be aloneâŠâ
âWhat?! No!â Harry finishes his drink, and Bradly gets him a new one right away. âWhy would I want to be alone with you?â He sees the obvious offense on her face, and shakes his head. âSorry, I didnât mean it that way. Weâre alone together all the time, arenât we? I just meant, in this setting.â He gestures to the bar around him. âIâve been a bit mopey since Kelly showed up, so my friends just wanted to take me out and show me a good time.â He looks over at Niall who already has his arm around Charlotte. âAlthough, I think theyâre bound to have a better night than me.â He sighs.
âYou havenât let on a mopey exterior, you could have told me.â
âItâs really none of your business how Iâm feeling, Y/N.â
âYouâre being awfully cold to someone who spent the night at your house just watch your dog.â
âYou spent the night because it was raining too heavily.â
âAnd then you made me breakfast.â
âAs an extra thank you.â
âYouâre annoying.â She takes a sip of her drink and faces forward. âNow I donât even have my friends to complain about you because youâve sent them off to your friends.â She rolls her eyes.
âMânot annoying. Iâm a fucking delight, just ask Max.â
âWhere is he anyways?â
âHome.â Harry shrugs. âHe can last a few hours without me. I almost texted you, but I would have felt bad asking again. I know you worked today, I honestly didnât expect to see you out.â
âIt was a long week for everyone. Iâm not staying much longer, I have to be at Bentoâs at four in the morning.â
âItâsâŠâ Harry looks down at his watch. âAlmost midnight, Cinderella.â He smirks at her and she canât help but laugh. It was a stupid and cheesy joke, but she liked it. âI didnât mean to be coldâŠI just didnât want you to think I was coming over here to pull a move or something.â
âIâm going to remind you again, you sent my friends away.â She smiles and takes a sip of her drink.
âI did.â He nods. âBut Iâll remind you, my friend Niall thinks Charlotte is cute. He thought you were cute too, by the way.â
âHe did?!â She looks over at them and then back to Harry. âBut you sent her off with him?â
âYup.â He takes a swig of his beer.
âWhy?!â
âCould be a little awkward to have my best friend canoodle with my TA.â
âRight, because it would be so easy to get into my bed.â She scoffs.
âI didnât say that.â
âYou implied it. And Iâm not one to kiss and tell, so unless he wanted to dish, you wouldnât have even heard anything from me about it.â
âDoesnât matter, I wouldnât have liked it. I donât know Charlotte so I donât really care what they do.â
âYou donât get to decide who I can and canât sleep with just because youâre too chicken to make a move.â Before he can say anything sheâs hopping off her stool and heading out of the bar.
Sheâs just about to order an uber when he grabs her wrist. It was chilly outside, and she could clearly see both of their breaths.
âWhat did you just say to me?â
âYou heard me.â She yanks her wrist free. âNow if youâll excuse me, Iâm going home to sleep for three hours so I can get up to bake some fucking bread.â She orders her uber, and Nessa comes rushing out.
âCharâs staying inside with, um, Niall? I saw you leave so I thought Iâd comeâŠwithâŠyouâŠâ She sees Harry who was practically fuming. âUm, I can wait inside, or-â
âItâs fine, the uber will be here in a minute.â She smiles at her friend and then glares at Harry. âAt least one of us is going to have a good time tonight.â She seethes.
âI had fun.â Nessa says, and then realizes what Y/N meant. âOh.â
âWhy are you still here? Go inside and find some random to fuck.â
âDonât talk to me like that, Y/N.â
âSorry, Iâm off the clock. I can speak to you however the fuck I want.â She steps closer to him. âI donât know where you get off being so sweet and kind one moment, and then turning into a major prick the second you feel threatened, but I donât need this.â
The uber pulls up, and without another word Y/N and Nessa get inside, leaving Harry outside in the cold.
//
Y/N woke up at 3:30AM and groaned, cursing at herself for going out. She only had to work until 9AM and then should could sleep the day away if she wanted. She was still so mad at Harry she could scream. He hadnât even tried to text her to apologize.
She sighs and makes her way to the kitchen once sheâs dressed. She stops short when she sees a half-naked Niall standing in her kitchen, filling two glasses of water.
âUmâŠhi.â She says to him as she grabs her daily vitamins out of the cabinet.
âHey.â He smiles. He looks her up and down. âAre you going to work?â
âI am.â She pops the gummy vitamins into her mouth.
âCould you do me a favor?â He steps a little closer to her. âTake it easy on Harry, alright?â Y/N scoffs at him. âI know, he was an asshole last night, but he just want to do anything that could put his job in danger, thatâs all.â
âHow would I do that? Iâm not his student, Iâm his colleague.â
âHe just feels weird about it, and heâs still figuring out his feelings. I think he likes you, to be quite honest. YouâveâŠperked him up, well not tonight, but anytime he mentions you he smiles.â
âHeâŠtalks about me?â
âOh sure, all the time actually.â He takes a sip of water. âI better go bring this to her. JustâŠconsider taking it easy on him, he knows he fucked up.â
Y/N nods as Niall makes his way back to Charlotteâs room. She drags herself out to her car and heads to Bentoâs. Once sheâs inside, she puts some music on and fires up the ovens. She loved baking, it helped clear her head for a little while. She would prep the bacon, get fresh muffins and cookies going, and she would even make croissants. By the time the rest of the morning crew shows up, sheâs just about halfway done with everything. She trays up everything to be rolled out for the people working out front. By the time 9AM rolled around she was exhausted, but had mostly forgotten how aggravated she was. She snags a coffee and a muffin on her way out, and stops short when she sees Harry sitting outside with Max.
âOh, thank god.â He says, standing up. Max sniffs at her feet and she bends down to pet the top of his head. âThey said you got off at nine, I hope itâs not weird that Iâm here.â
âHow long have you been waiting out here?â
âWell, I came by at 6:30 when they opened, but you were really busy, so I just came back twenty minutes ago. Can we talk?â
âNot right now. Iâm covered in flour and sweat, and Iâd like to take a shower and then take a nap. I got two hours of sleep last night. It was my own doing, but still.â
âWhen then?â
âIâll text you.â She shrugs. âNiall spent the night, I bumped into him this morning. He said you fucked up?â
âI did.â He rubs the back of his neck. âDo what you need to do, and then, uh, come bay later, yeah? We can have a late lunch or something, and I can explain myself. Would you like that?â
âDepends, whatâs on the menu?â
âSâcold out, do you like grilled cheese and tomato soup?â
âLove it.â She smiles. âIâll let you know when I wake up.â
âAlright, thanks.â
Y/N takes a nice long shower when she gets home, her roommates still peacefully sleeping. She wondered if Niall was still there or if he slipped out a couple hours after her. She didnât care that much, she was too tired to care. Once her hair is dry, she slips a t-shirt on and crawls into bed.
âY/N! Iâve let you sleep long enough, please wake up!â Charlotte was absolutely giddy, and dying to fill Y/N in. It was around 2PM, she definitely caught up on sleep.
âGimme five minutes!â Y/N yells back. She was groggy and didnât want to be cranky.
Y/N comes out to the couch and lays down. Nessa was out with Andy, but she had heard about everything earlier. Charlotte brings Y/N a cup of tea and smiles at her.
âThank you.â She takes a careful sip. âAlright, go ahead.â
âBest sex Iâve ever fucking had!â She squeals. âHe had me all over the bed, it was wild. Iâm surprised we didnât wake you.â
âI passed out the second I got home.â She chuckles. âBest you ever had, huh? What exactly did he do?â
âWhat didnât he do?! Fingers, tongue, and dick, it was incredible. I rode him, then he got on top, and then he did me from behind, bent me over the bed, I got on top again. His stamina was incredible. I made him some breakfast this morning and then he left.â
âDid he give you his number?â
âHe did.â She beams. âHe said he wasnât looking for anything serious at the moment, but I was free to text him anytime I wanted him like that again.â She bites her bottom lip and sinks further into the couch. âI totally donât mind at all. It would be nice to start up a new little fling. It wonât be weird for you, will it?â
âNot at all, itâs not like youâreâŠoh my god.â She pinches the bridge of her nose with her thumb and forefinger.
âWhat?â
âI totally get where he was coming from now.â She groans.
âWhat do you mean?â
âHe said he told me that, uh, his other friend thought I was cute, and I told him I was mad because he sent the two of you away, and that he couldnât tell me who I could and couldnât fuck, but I would have been so mad if you slept with Harry.â
âI wouldnât have, though. I know how much you likeâŠâ She gasps. âDo you think he likes you too?!â
âI donât know, maybe!â Y/N takes her phone out to text Harry that sheâs up and that sheâll be over within the hour. âIâm going to his place for a late lunch, he wants to apologize, but I owe him one just the same. I flipped out for no reason.â
âWell, at least youâre realizing it. Very adult of you.â
âOh, shut up.â She nudges her and gets up to change.
//
Y/N gets to Harryâs around 3PM. She paired a green cardigan and a black tank top with a pair of jeans. She gets out of the car and rings his bell. She giggles when she hears Max barking from behind the door.
âShh, itâs just Y/N.â Harry coos to Max as he opens his door. âHi.â
âHi.â
âUm, come in.â He moves aside and lets her in. âHere, think he misses you.â Y/N takes Max from Harry and snuggles him close.
âItâs only been a couple days.â She pouts at the dog.
âCome, sit, the foodâs ready.â
Y/N sets Max down and sits down at the table. Harry already had the grilled cheese and soup out on the table.
âThis looks good, thank you.â
âYouâre welcome.â
âHarryâŠI know you wanted to apologize, but I realized today that you werenât totally in the wrong.â
âYes I was.â He sighs and blows on his soup before slurping some from his spoon. âMaybe it wasnât what I said, but it was how I said it. I overstepped. Youâre a grown woman, I had no right to tell my friend he couldnât hit it on you.â
âWell, it all worked out because Charlotte seems to have a new fuck buddy on her hands.â She chuckles and takes a bite of her sandwich. âLook, I appreciate you saying all that, but when I was talking to her earlier, I realized I would have done the same thing. I would have told my friends not to flirt with you or try to pick you up, and I would have been pissed if one of them slept with you.â
âYou would have?â
âYes.â
âWhy?â
âYou know why.â She grumbles. âIâŠI meanâŠâ
âWeâre stuck between a rock and a hard place here, Y/N.â He sighs and sits back in his chair.
âWe are?â
âYes. I did a lot of thinking last night, did some talking with my friends. I had to really think about why I got so upset. The thing is, youâre my TA, and youâre going to be my TA next semester as well, most likely. I have a meeting about it Monday. Selfishly, I donât want anyone else to have you.â
âIn more ways than one, obviously.â She smirks.
âDonât be cute.â He gives her a playful smile. âI think Iâd miss you too much, to be honest. I like sharing my office with you. Your help with Max has been great, youâre, like, part of my life now.â
âIs there some rule that says that we canâtâŠlikeâŠgo out?â
âI donât knowâŠI think it would look unprofessional on my part. I know youâre not one of my students, so itâs not as bad as that, but I still have a position of power over you, and if someone found out something was going, it could look really bad. I wouldnât want something to taint your reputation either.â
âWell, Iâve been over here twice now, and no oneâs said a thing.â
âYou havenât been on campus since Thursday. Someone could easily say something to us Monday.â
âA lot of people know I help with Max.â
âSome people may know you used to be a student of mine as well. They could assume somethingâs been going on for years.â
âNot true, wouldnât people know about Kelly?â Harry grimaces at the name. âSorry.â
âItâs alright.â
âSoâŠI feel like weâre just going around in circles here, Harry. Like, what are we doing?â
âWell, if I vouch for you to be my TA again next semester, would you? The course would be for Creativity and the Visual World, and I think you could really shine there, talk about IDS. Also, I donât know what your plans are after you graduate, or where youâll want to go, but Iâve caught wind that one of the instructional designers on campus is going to retire at the end of the school year.â
âWow, so youâre like really trying to keep me around.â She smirks.
âItâs not like that.â He chuckles. âI just mean, it could be a good first gig for you. Youâre very good at all that, thought you might be interested to know thereâs going to be an opening. You know the campus well, it would be a smooth transition for you.â
âThat would be ideal, I do want to work in higher ed when Iâm done.â
âI could help you with your cover letter, Iâm really good at writing those. Iâve helped plenty of students.â
âIâll definitely look into it.â She finishes what she can of the food, and sits back as well.
âI really am sorry about last night, I felt awful.â
âItâs okay, I really get it.â She sighs. âSoâŠI still donât know what weâre doing. Are we just choosing not to date anyone else and also not each other? Why should I wait until I graduate to be with someone?â
âMânot asking you to do that. I donât really know what Iâm asking you to do. I just donât want to be a clichĂ©. The young professor getting with someone that works for him. Iâm attracted to you, I can admit that, but I donât want to get fired, nor do I want your name getting dragged through the mud.â
âSo, essentially, while Iâm your TA we canât do anything.â
âCorrect.â
âAnd youâd rather suffer and have me be your TA again next semester just to have me around you, even though it would mean we still couldnât do anything.â
âYes.â
âAlright, after the holidays Iâll be staying at my apartment for winter break. We pay for a full year, and I like having the time alone. I also still work at Bentoâs.â She stands up and puts her things in the sink.
âWhat are you saying exactly?â
âIâm saying, over winter break weâre in limbo. I wonât be your TA, and Iâll be all alone in my three bedroom apartment. Perhaps thereâll be a night Iâm feeling especially lonely and youâll have the marvelous idea of visiting me with Max, and whatever happens will happen.â
âAnd then what? Act like it didnât when the spring semester starts?â
âI guess weâd cross that bridge when we come to it. All I know is that for six weeks, you will in no way have a position of power over me. By the way, Iâm twenty-three years old, itâs like you said, Iâm a grown woman. Youâre not taking advantage of me. I know how it would look to others, so I can respect where youâre coming from. However, Iâd like to try things out before I tell someone Iâm going to wait for them.â
With that, Y/N gives Max one last squeeze, and out the door she goes. She was proud of herself. Harry liked her, and he wanted to be with her. It was a dream come true. She also didnât mind sort of waiting for him, it would just make things all the more hot when theyâd finally be able to come together.
//
The rest of the semester went byâŠokay. There was a lot of tension, a lot of it. Harry was just thankful it was getting colder which meant that Y/N was bundling up more. She did, however, look insanely cute in her many layers and scarves. They were busy grading, not having much time for chat chit. She started going over his place more, though. They would have little grading parties where they could just spread out and get things done. His place was also another quiet haven for her to escape to.
Charlotte hooked with Niall almost every weekend, it was pretty cute. They were having fun, and Y/N was happy for her friend. Even though sometimes Y/N wished Harry would just fuck her on his kitchen table on top of all the graded papers and tests, and maybe sometimes he fantasized about the same thing, but it had to stay professional. She didnât want him regretting anything. Sometimes he would come into Bentoâs when she was working, she even snuck him in early one morning to show him how she made the croissants he liked so much. They were essentially dating, but without all the physical stuff.
At least Y/N could catch some relief later at night in her bed. She didnât think of Harry at first. Her routine mostly consisted of headphones, pornhub, and a few orgasms. But there was one particular night her and Harry were sitting in front of his fireplace, and he just looked so sexy, and she wanted him to take her on his living room floor, she didnât even care if her tailbone would be bruised the next day. She still hadnât even seen his fucking bedroom, it was the one part of the house she wasnât allowed in. So she start fantasizing about his bed, and then one thing led to another and she ended up moaning out his name in a shallow breath. It had caught her by surprise, and she was almost embarrassed about it.
Harry would have been lying if he said he wasnât doing the same thing. It mostly happened early in the morning when heâd take his shower. It just sort of happened. He woke up one morning, rolled over and wished she was there next to him. He had seen her fall asleep so many times, and he thought she was incredibly cute. He liked having Max in the bed, but he wanted Y/N. So when he got into the shower he just couldnât stop thinking about her. He didnât feel embarrassed, he didnât feel guilty, he mostly felt annoyed because he just wanted the real thing.
It was confirmed that Y/N would be his TA again in the spring, and they were both exited. He liked having her in his office, and he thought they worked together really well. It was worth it, it was all going to be worth it.
Harry went home to London for the holidays, and Y/N went home to her parentsâ house. It was a tough goodbye. They hugged, and maybe they kissed each other on the cheek, but neither wanted to let go. Y/N loved seeing her family, but ten days was plenty. She liked having her apartment to herself. Nessa and Charlotte wouldnât be back for a few weeks. That meant Y/N could watch whatever she wanted on TV, she didnât have to worry about being quiet on the early mornings she had to work, and she could take a long shower.
A big snow storm was coming, which was starting to make Y/N nervous. Stores were closing in preparation, and she wasnât sure if she wanted to weather it alone.
Y/N: are you back from London? Canât remember when you said youâd be homeâŠ
Harry: hey! I was just going to message you, I got back yesterday, was just sleeping off the jetlag. Whatâs up?
Y/N: this impending storm is freaking me outâŠ
Harry: do you wanna get snowed in at my place? Just stalked up at the grocery storeâŠ
Y/N: are you sure? I donât wanna be a burden :(
Harry: you wouldnât be! You know I want to see you, so does Max :)
Y/N: okay! Iâll pack a bag and head over, see you soon!
Harry had been cute while he was away, sending Y/N a few selfies of him and Max. She had been to his house so many times, this wouldnât be weird at all to spend a couple of snowy days together. She gets all her things packed, and makes her way to Harryâs. It was just starting to flurry when she parked in his driveway. He comes outside to help her with her things.
âAnd this time, youâll let me set up the pullout for you. No need to sleep on a couch for two days.â
âOkay.â
She was hoping heâd give in and let her sleep in his bed with him. Actually, she was hoping heâd pick her up, swing her around, and kiss her. He sets her things down and waits for her to take her coat off, then he hugs hers.
âHad a good holiday?â He asks as he lets her go.
âYeah, it was good. You?â
âIt was great, love getting to see my family.â Max comes trotting in and greets Y/N.
âThereâs my little man.â She scoops him up and gives him kisses.
âI was just going to make some tea, would you like some?â
âPlease.â She plops down with Max on the couch.
âDo you have to work at Bentoâs during all this? I can drive you if you want.â
âNo, they closed in preparation of the storm.â
âOh, good!â
Y/N turns the TV on, and scrolls through Netflix for something simple to watch. Harry comes over with two mugs of tea and he sits down next to her.
âFind anything good? Feel like itâs all Christmas movies right now.â
âNothing yetâŠâ She squints at the TV. âHow aboutâŠoh! Have you watched Love, Victor yet? Itâs been on my list for ages.â
âIs it based off of Love, Simon?â
âYeah! This kid Victor is new in town, and ends up going to the same school Simon did.â
âSure, we could watch that.â
âShit, itâs on Hulu, you have that right?â
âMhm, gimme the remote, Iâll switch it over.â She hands it to him and sips on her tea while he queues it up.
âMm, this is tasty, what is it?â
âItâs black tea with honey, love.â He looks at her wants to laugh. âI donât usually add anything, but I thought youâd like the honey.â
âItâs perfect, thank you.â
The show starts just as the sun was setting outside. Y/N pulls the blanket Harry keeps on the back of the couch over her legs, and Max moves to Harryâs lap.
âLet me know if Iâm being a blanket hog.â
âSâalright, he keeps me pretty warm.â
âDonât be annoying.â She huffs and spreads the blanket out equally over them. âSee, nice and cozy.â
âIâm not being annoying, Iâm beingâŠrespectful.â
âGolly gee, thanks, mister.â She pouts at him and he rolls his eyes.
âNow whoâs being annoying?â
A couple of episodes in, and Harryâs stomach starts rumbling.
âAre you hungry? I can pop a pizza in the oven, or make some pasta?â
âPizza would be perfect, thank you.â
âPause it, I just need a minute to get it in the oven.â
Y/N nods and scrolls through her phone while she waits for him to come back. This was nice. It was like they were hanging out as friends, which was okay, but she was hoping heâd make a move for fuckâs sake.
âAlright, should be about fifteen minutes.â He smiles and gets back under the blanket. Y/N presses and play and they get back into it.
After the pizza, they nearly almost binge the entire show. Harry was starting to doze off, so they decide to call it a night. He looks outside in the kitchen window.
âI am not looking forward to digging out our cars. Times like this I wish I had a garage.â He sighs.
âYou say that like youâll be doing it alone. Iâve got all my snow gear, I can help.â
âRight, like Iâd let you break your back out there.â He scoffs, and puts his hand on her shoulder. âLet me make up the pullout for you.â
Y/N watches as Harry moves the coffee table, and hoists the pullout into place. The sheets were already on it, so he just lays the blankets and pillows out.
âWell, Iâll be upstairs with Max if you need anything. Goodnight.â
âGoodnight, thanks again for letting me stay. I think I would have been scared all alone.â
âNo worries, Iâm glad youâre here. I, uh, missed you over the holidays.â He clears his throat and heads upstairs.
Y/N does her nightly routine and puts on a tank top and pajama pants for bed. She gets onto the pullout and tries to listen to some music to fall asleep, but the wind was whipping so harshly outside, it was making her uneasy. She hated storms more than anything. Would Harry mind if she crawled into bed with him? She could even sleep on the floor. She just didnât want to be down here alone. She sighs and slowly gets out of the bed. She makes her way upstairs.
Harryâs bedroom was the entire upstairs, it was sort of like a loft. He had a king sized bed, a decent looking bedroom set, and an en suite. Y/N thought it was really nice, well, what she could make out of it since it was so dark.
âHarry?â She whispers. His head was in his pillow, sleeping on his tummy.
âMm?â He grunts, clearly out of it.
âIâm a little scared downstairs, would it be alright if I slept on the floor up here?â
âGet in.â He mumbles.
âReally, are you sure? Because I-â
He flips some of the covers back, eyes still closed. Y/N takes a deep breath and gets into the bed. Max was half asleep, but he moves away from Harry to make room for her, plopping down near his feet. Y/N climbs in and faces away from him. This was such a large bed for one guy, and it made her wonder who was the last person to share it with him. She wanted to keep a respectful distance from him, but before she could start counting sheep, his arm was wrapped around her waist, pulling her close to him. Her breath hitched, but she could hear his steady breathing, he was definitely asleep. He must just sleep better when heâs holding onto something, she thinks.
//
Harryâs eyes flutter open around 5AM. He was used to getting up that early to take Max out, but for some reason he felt like he got some of the most restful sleep heâs gotten in a long time. He feels warm and cozy, and even though he knows he needs to get up and brave the cold so his dog could relieve himself, he found himself nuzzling in to whatever he was holding onto.
Thatâs when it hits him that he wasnât dreaming last night, and Y/N genuinely came up into his room because she was feeling uneasy being all alone downstairs. She was still fully clothed, but he wasnât he was only in his boxers. His leg was between hers, and she was pressed up against him. He wondered if she slept well like this. Just because he slept better holding onto something didnât mean that she would.
He makes subtle movements, not wanting to wake her. He nearly winced leaving the warmth of the bed, but he got through it. Max pops his head up and Harry puts his finger up to his lips to signal that he needed to be quiet. Harry snatches his sweatpants and a pair of socks, and grabs Max to take him downstairs. He throws his coat and boots on, gets the leash on Max, and out the door he goes. He shoves his beanie down over his ears as he feels the wind whip around. There were snow drifts everywhere and it was still coming down. He uses the flashlight on his phone so Max could see what he was doing.
âCome on, buddy, I know itâs cold, but Daddy doesnât wanna be out here long.â He wanted to get back to Y/N.
Once Max does his business, Harry gets him so food and fresh water. He strips himself of his jacket and socks, but leaves his sweatpants on. He was shirtless, but he was too groggy from the morning to care. Once Max is all set, Harry carries him upstairs so his collar doesnât jingle around. He plops him on the bed, and he goes right over to Y/N to curl up with her. Harry uses the bathroom quick, brushing his teeth and all that, and then slowly slides back into bed. Y/N hadnât moved, still laying on her side facing away from him, so he just wraps himself back around her. Well, he thought she hadnât moved. The second she heard the door close downstairs, she sprinted down to âherâ bathroom to wash up and brush her own teeth. She wasnât sure if morning snuggles would ensue, but she wanted to be fresh if they did.
A sigh leaves Harryâs lips as he settles back in, pressing nice and close to her and keeping his arm around her waist. She gives it a few minutes, and then she adjust against him. She could tell he was wearing sweatpants now, and not just his boxers. She was subtle about it, not fully pressing her ass against him, just a simple adjustment, so he didnât think anything of it. After another couple of moments, she presses back into him, and he involuntarily presses forward towards her. He was definitely starting to get hard. He grips her waist a little tighter as he continues to press into her.
âMm, Harry?â She rolls onto her back to look up at him.
âHi.â He moves his hand away from her lower stomach to move some hair away from her face. âHowâd you end up here, hm?â He asks softly.
âStorms really scare me, and the wind was loud.â She starts smiling. âFeel much better now.â His hand slides down to cup her jaw. âI asked first and you told me to get in.â
âI did, didnât IâŠâ
âPulled me right up close to you, it was nice.â She sighs.
âCanât remember the last time I slept so well, to be honest.â
He lets go of her and flops onto his back, groaning. She rolls onto her side and props herself up with her elbow, resting her cheek on her palm.
âYou make things so difficult for yourself. Iâm not your TA right now.â
âBut you will be again.â
âBecause you wanted me to be.â
He looks at her and pouts.
âWeâll see each other more this way.â
âButâŠwouldnât it be nice to go out on dates and touch and-â
âYouâve seen how busy I am, I rarely have time to see my friends as it is. Iâd feel guilty for not being able to do those things with you.â
âYou have me to yourself for the next four weeks, Harry, and the girls wonât be back until a week before school starts.â
âWeâd have to stop when the semester starts back up, and wait again. I donât know if Iâll be able to do that.â
âWe could be discrete.â
âIâd have to be a little cold towards you.â
âYouâre no stranger to that.â She scoffs.
âY/N.â Harryâs hand finds her hip. âThis is serious.â
âIâm about to graduate, from grad school, Harry. Itâs not like Iâm some eighteen year old girl sitting in one of your classes. Iâm twenty-three, and youâre twenty-six, itâs really not that weird.â
âIâll be twenty-seven next month.â He mutters.
âGreat, then we can go out and celebrate when the time comes. Is there something in a handbook saying we canâtâŠdo this?â
âItâs extremely frowned upon, I can assure you.â He groans again before speaking. âThis is so frustrating, itâs not like youâre my first TA either, fuck, even I was a TA. Shit like this never happened. Iâve never beenâŠattracted to someone Iâve worked with before.â
âYouâre probably the only professor Iâve been into before.â
âSee, right there, you had a thing for me when you were in my class only a couple of years ago, and-â
âAnd nothing happened then. You barely remembered me when I first came to your office. I was a flustered senior, that was it. NowâŠwell, I know you now. Iâm way less nervous around, I feel like I can really talk to you.â
âI feel the same way.â He sighs. âFucking, Christ.â He yanks her down to her chest, and she yelps. His fingers scratch at her scalp and she nearly whimpers at how nice it feels to lay on his chest, having him play with her hair. âWe can lay here a little longer, and then I need to go to move some of the snow.â
âIâm helping.â She puts a leg over his. âAnd youâre still a littleâŠriled up, donât you want to-â
âNo.â
âBut I could-â
âY/N.â She looks up at him. âJust lay here with me.â
They both doze back off for a bit until Max starts barking. He must need to pee. Harry gets up and tells Y/N she can shower if she wants to.
âIâll wait, Iâll get sweaty shoveling.â
âItâs my house, you donât need to help.â He throws on a long sleeve shirt and thick socks. He looks at her crossing her arms over her chest. âHere.â He tosses her one of his sweaters. âCome on, Max.â
They all head downstairs. His sweater smelled just like him. She hoped she could keep this too just like with the pjâs he had given her a couple of months ago. He takes Max out quick, and then sets him back inside so he can get to shoveling. Y/N decides she could make him breakfast since he wouldnât let her help outside.
She goes through his fridge and cupboards to find some different things. She wanted to make something that would take some time so it would be warm for him when he got inside.
âMuffins!â She says to herself as she rifles through his baking supplies.
She whips up a mixture of blueberry muffins and get them popped in the oven. She has the glorious idea to slice them in half and butt them up on his griddle when theyâre done, just to give it a little crunch. Next, she cracks some eggs into the pan, and makes them sunny side down because she remembers him making them that way. She even finds some bacon to throw on the griddle.
When he comes inside, his nostrils are hit with everything sheâs made. Everything was on plates on the kitchen table, and she was washing everything in the sink. He strips down to his boxers, having been drenched with sweat after digging out their cars. The snow was still falling, but it was good to get ahead of things before it all froze.
âHarry, I madeâŠâ She freezes when she looks at him. Seeing his full body in the light was much different than in the hazy darkness of his bedroom.
âI didnât know I had blueberry muffins.â He says as he looks down at the plates.
âYou, um, you didnât, I made them.â
âFrom scratch?â
âWell, yeah.â
He picks up the muffin bottom and takes a bite. His eyes close for a second as he gets a good taste. It was buttery and a bit crisp from being on the griddle. It was perfection. He turns to her after he swallows.
âYouâreâŠa literal angel.â He steps closer to her, and he notices her eyes drift down and back up. âIâll go put some clothes, and then-â
She puts a hand on his chest. Her eyes plead with his. Just kiss me, she silently says to him. Â His hands fly up to her jaw, and he pulls her in, lips crashing together, finally. She melts into him immediately. His tongue slides along her bottom lip, and she opens up for him. She can taste the blueberry muffin on him, and it makes her suck on his tongue. He groans against her, and his hands slide down to her ass to get a good squeeze. She wraps her arms around his neck and pulls him even closer.
âHarry.â She breathes against his lips.
He gets a good grip on her and lifts her up to sit her on the counter. He quickly draws the shades for the window above the sink so anyone out shoveling wouldnât be able to see anything. He tugs at the sweater of his he was wearing and lifts it off her. Her legs open wide for him to stand between. His lips attach to the crook of her neck, sucking, licking, biting. Her hips buck towards his as she tugs at his hair. One of his hands lifts her shirt slightly, and she thinks heâs going to feel her breasts up, but instead his fingers find the band of her pajama pants. He stops to look at her.
âCan I?â
âYes.â
His hand dips below, and itâs almost like heâs searching for something else.
âAre you not wearing any knickers?â
âNo.â She blinks at him. âI donât usually wear underwear to bed.â
âJesus Christ.â
She opens her legs a little wider for him, and he groans when his fingers touch around her folds, and he feels her wetness sticking to him already. His other arm wraps around behind her to hold her close to him. He plays around with her, fingers rubbing all around until his middle finger slides in. She gasps, not having expected so much so soon, but she wasnât complaining. She clutches at his shoulders when she feels another finger slip inside. He twists them around, just getting a feel for things, and he curls them up, knowing this was what she really wanted.
âOh! Oh my god.â Her head rolls back. He was make that come here motion right on that sweet spot of her front wall. His lips find her neck again as he continues. His thumb starting to rub on her clit. âOh fuck, Harry, oh my god.â She didnât realize how whiney she could sound, but he loved. She was a mess for him.
âBeen thinking about this for so long.â He says into her ear.
âMe too.â She was panting now. âIt feels so good.â
âYeah? Like having my fingers buried inside you?â
Her mouth falls open. He was into dirty talk and it made her clench around him.
âYes, oh my fucking god, yes.â She bites down on his collar bone to try to muffle any louder noises, but he was knuckle deep, fucking her with his fingers, it was no use. âHarry, Iâm so close, oh fuck!â
His hand around her waist reaches up to tug at the back of her head. He wanted to watch her go through the motions. He wanted to see just how good he was making her feel. Her eyes rolls into the back of her head as she continues to beck forward. Her release was long, and so very good. She cried out, maybe a little louder than she should have, but he wasnât telling her to keep it down. Did he want his neighbors to hear? Did he want them to know how good he could fuck someone?
He slows down his motions inside of her, helping her through the aftershocks, and then he slowly retracts his fingers. He sucks them into his mouth and then steps away from her. She was breathless. He kisses her cheeks and then helps her hop down from the counter.
âYou made such a nice breakfast, letâs not let it go to waste.â
âHarryâŠâ She watches him sit down.
âWhat?â
âDonât you want to-â
âIâm all sweaty, Iâd like to take a shower before going further if thatâs alright with you.â
âOkay.â
She sits down with him and eats her food that she was now ravenous for.
âYou really made this from scratch?â
âYeah, Iâm glad you like it.â
âItâs delicious.â
They finish eating and decide to clean up later. She follows him upstairs to his shower. He helps her out of her clothes and lets her get in first. She throws her hair up into a bun so it doesnât get soaked. He rids himself of his boxers and gets in behind her. She moves aside so he can wash up. She presses her front to his back, and her hands roam along his long torso.
âYou made me feel so good, I think itâs your turn.â
She kisses on his back while she starts to stroke his hardening length. It felt so big in her hand. Harryâs head falls to his chest, and he presses a palm to the tile wall to keep himself grounded. She runs her thumb over his tip and he groans. He grabs her hand and turns around. He backs her up to the opposite wall, cradling the back of her head as he basically slams her against it. His lips are on hers in seconds. Everything felt hot and wet, and just otherworldly. Y/N couldnât enough. In the back of her head she kept thinking that she couldnât believe this was happening. It wasnât often that she got what she wanted.
âPlease, fuck me.â She says against his lips.
âI donât have any condoms.â He kisses down her neck and kneads her breasts.
âIâm on the pill.â
âSânot what Iâm worried about.â He pulls his head back to look at her. âAre you clean?â
âI am, actually. I was tested last time I went to the doctor. Are you?â
âI am.â He smiles. âSoâŠyou really wanna feel all of me? Just like that?â
âYes.â She whines. âPlease.â
He kisses her and bites on her bottom lip, sucking on it as he pleases. He lifts one of legs up over his hip, and uses his other hand to line himself up. She was still plenty wet, so heâs able to push inside.
âFuck, Y/N.â He grunts, trying to push further inside her. âSo tight.â
âIâŠChrist, I think youâre just really big.â She gasps once heâs all the way inside.
His head drops to watch himself slowly thrust in and out of her. He bites his bottom lip at the sight. He looks back up at her, watching her features.
âAre you comfortable?â
âCould you maybe just hold my leg up?â
Harry nods and hooks his arm under leg, driving in deeper. Her head rolls back against the tile. Once he knew she was okay, he didnât let up. He was fucking her hard and fast, only slowing up so he could hear her whimper and beg for more. Her nails were clawing at his back, and it was just egging him on. He uses his other hand to rub at her clit. She was starting to breathe heavier, moan after moan leaving her lips. He could tell she was close.
âGonna come again for me?â
âYes, fuck, Iâm almost there, Harry!â
He sucks the tender skin of her neck between his teeth, and thatâs what pushes her over the edge. Her senses totally overwhelmed. He gasps when he feels how deeply her nails dig into him from going through the motions of her orgasm. He pulls out of her quickly and comes on her stomach. Heâs out of breath, pressing kisses to her cheek and neck.
âNo going back now.â He says as he caresses her cheek.
âNope.â She smiles.
He pecks her lips and turns back around to stand in the water again. Her eyes grow wide and he winces once the water cascades over him.
âHarry, Iâm so sorry, I didnât realize I was hurting you.â
âIt didnât hurt while it was happening, is it bleeding?â He looks over his shoulder trying to see for himself.
âUmâŠI broke the skin, but itâs not bloody.â She blushes. âYikes, thatâs embarrassing.â
âNo itâs not.â He chuckles and moves so she can rinse her stomach off in the water. She turns it off and they both step out to towel off. âI wasnât hurting you was I?â
âNo, oh my god, it felt so good. Feels like Iâm still throbbing.â
He wraps his arms around her waist and pulls her close. She rests her hands on his chest.
âDo you like ice skating?â
âWhat?â She laughs. âYeah, I love it, why?â
âBecause once this storm is over, mâtaking you on a proper date.â He kisses her forehead and lets her go. âWould you like that?â
âIâd love it.â
Harry was so peculiar, Y/N thought. One second heâs saying they canât be together and the next he wants to take her out on a date. What she didnât know was that he had never felt quite so good while having sex. It wasnât because she felt incredibly tight around him, it had more to do with the trust and natural connect. He felt happy, a feeling he thought would never return.
//
To Y/Nâs surprise, Harry was a really good ice skater. The two of them were like a real couple. He would visit her at work, theyâd go out to the bar with his friends, and theyâd have sleep overs at each otherâs places. He quite liked her apartment. Not to mention, he couldnât keep his hands off her. If they were going for a brisk walk, his hand was in hers. If they were sitting through a move, his arm was around her shoulders, and of course they were having a lot of sex. Even when she had her period, he fucked her.
âGot my red wings years ago, promise it doesnât gross me out.â He had told her.
And god, when he ate her out. Sometimes they wouldnât even have full on sex. Sometimes theyâd be on the couch, and heâd ask if she would ride her face, and then they would just sixty-nine. Sometimes she would just blow him because she liked the way his come tasted. Harry drank a fuck ton of pineapple juice, even before they started hooking up, he always had a small can of it in his office. He just liked the taste. They were just intimate in all sorts of ways, totally comfortable.
It was when Nessa and Charlotte returned that Harryâs bubbled had to burst. School would be starting in a week, and he needed to make sure his shit was together. He had been to the office a few times, working to make sure his courses were together. He and Y/N were professional and went over the class she would be the TA for.
âThis is gonna have to be what itâs like when school starts again, donât forget.â He would say. It killed her, but she would never do anything to put his job at risk, even if she didnât think their situation was all that serious. She had to respect his wishes.
âIâd feel more comfortable if you slept over at my place since their home.â
âHarry, they know whatâs been going onâŠNiall and Charlotte still talk, and they-â
âI donât care, Iâd rather you be hereâŠand only on the weekends.â
âWhat?â
âSaturday nights can be our night. On the weekends, youâre not my TA.â
âWhat will I be then?â
âMy girl.â
They had put the boyfriend/girlfriend label chat on the back burner, but that was all she needed to hear to know that she was really his, and he certainly didnât want someone else trying to steal her away. He had gotten her a necklace, it was simple, but very much her style. A way of showing her how much she truly meant to him.
âAnytime during the week youâre feeling like I donât want you because I canât show my affection, this will be your reminder of how much I care.â
She thought it was incredibly sweet, and it was nice to have the reassurance. When classes started, it was definitely difficult. The one thing getting her through this first week was his birthday party on Saturday. Just a small thing with friends at the bar, but still. They wouldnât have to hide there, or so she thought. Some other professors were invited to the party, which meant Harry couldnât touch Y/N. He frowned immediately. He wasnât in charge of the guest list. He pulls Y/N to the side before they walk into the main area.
âIâm so sorry, I promise when we get back to my place later Iâm gonna love on you all night.â
âHarry, itâs okay. Itâs your birthday, Iâm the one thatâll be doing the loving. Go on, enjoy.â
He gives her a discrete peck on the cheek, and then walks into the main room to say hello to everyone. Y/N invited Charlotte and Nessa, so she had other people to talk to. Niallâs arm was hooked around Charlotteâs waist the entire night. Y/N and Nessa teased her every chance they got.
âIâve been told to check in on you. Orders from the birthday boy.â Louis says to Y/N.
âThanks.â She chuckles. âItâs okay. Next year things will be totally different.â
âReally see things lasting then, donât you.â It wasnât a question.
âI think so, yeah. If the person who he said actually retires, Iâm hoping to be able to work at the university to start out.â
âThat would be great. He raves about you, you know? Heâs a simple guy, likes being domestic. I think he said one of his favorite things to do with you is just cook a meal together.â
âAw, heâs so sweet.â She pouts. âI like doing that too.â
Harry was mingling with everyone that came out for his birthday. Everyone sang to him, a cake was made him too. The second he tasted it he knew Y/N had baked it. He thought at the least they could have their picture taken together, that wouldnât look weird.
âHarry!â One of the faculty members, Constance, comes over to him, a young woman by her side. âThereâs someone I want you to meet, this is my daughter, Angie.â
âOh! Hi, Iâve heard a lot about you.â He politely shakes her hand.
âItâs nice to meet you too.â She blushes.
âIâll leave you to it.â Constance winks and walks away.
âIâm so sorry about her. She conned me into coming here, hope Iâm not crashing your birthday.â
âYouâre not.â He looks back at Y/N and then to Angie. âSo, this is a set up then?â
âShe seems to think we have a lot in common.â
âAnd perhaps we might, butâŠIâm sort of seeing someone. Itâs aâŠlong distance thing, so sheâs not here tonight, unfortunately.â
âOh! She could have sworn you were single, Iâm so sorry.â
âItâs alright. Iâm sure youâre lovely, I just really like this woman and I donât want to screw it up.â He smiles and she nods.
Harry finally makes his way over to Y/N and Louis.
âDo me a favor,â He says to Louis, taking out his phone. âTake a picture of us.â
âAre you sure?â Y/N asks.
âPositive.â He smiles and puts an arm around her shoulders. Louis snaps a couple of shots and hands Harry his phone back. âSorry you wonât be able to post theseâŠâ
âWell, I could, my insta is private, but we can talk about it later.â
âLou, could you drop Y/N off at my place when this is over, we drove together, but I donât wanna risk anyone seeing us leave in the same car.â
âCourse, mate.â
Harry nods and walks away to continue talking to other people.
âHe acts like youâre his student. I donât see anything wrong with you two doing what youâre doing.â
âI donât either.â She sighs. âBut he worked so hard to get where he is, I have to respect doing things his way. It was a long week, but Iâm happy to be going back to his place later.â
Y/Nâs lips were on Harryâs the second he let her through the door. He made sure to get home before her so they didnât even leave at the same time. She had him pushed against the wall and his hands were all over her.
âMissed you so fucking much.â He says, walking her back towards the living room. âAnd I loved the watch you got me, you didnât have to do that.â
âWanted to.â She starts unbuttoning his shirt and pushes him down on the couch, straddling him in no time.
âGonna let me lick it, angel?â
âIs that what you want?â
âYou have no idea. Youâre as sweet as the cake you made me.â
âHow did-â
âY/N, I know itâs only been a month, but Iâd know your baked goods anywhere.â He smirks.
She giggles and stands up to unbutton her jeans. He yanks them down her legs along with her panties and she kicks them to the side. Harry lays down on the couch and Y/N hovers over his face. He liked it better this way. One, he didnât have to get on his knees and suffer through the pain of being on the hardwood. Two, he liked the way Y/N would just ride his tongue.
Max was upstairs, thanks to the gate. So they didnât have to worry about him coming down and jumping on them.
âFuck, Harry.â She moans. âYour tongue feels so good.â She rocks her hips back and forth on him, the stubble from his chin feeling extra delicious. He moans against her, lapping up every drop. âYou like that, birthday boy? Like having me on you like this?â She looks down at him and see his eyes rolling into the back of his head. He sucks on her clit harshly, and that pushes her over the edge. âOh, fuck!â
Once sheâs through, she climbs off him. Before she knows it, heâs throwing her over his shoulder to bring her upstairs. He gives her bum a smack and she squeals. Y/N left plenty of scratch marks on Harry that night.
//
Y/N was antsy for every weekend. The weeks dragged on, and the weekends went by in a flash. Then she remembered something wonderful.
âSpring break!â She says, bursting into their shared office.
âWhat about it?â Harry chuckles.
âTwo weeks off without the students!â She leans a little closer to him. âTwo weeks of me not being your TA.â She grins and then sits down in her seat.
âWeâll be grading, darling.â He says nonchalantly.
âThis is a pet name free zone, remember?â
âSorry.â He smirks. âDidnât think âdarlingâ would get your knickers in twist.â
âFuck off.â She rolls her eyes. âDo we seriously have to grade? Canât we do fun things? I have time off from school, I donât wanna do anything.â
âMâsurprised you donât want to go home or go with your friends somewhere.â
âIâve done the whole go to Florida and get blitzed thing, Iâm all set. And I may go home for a couple of days, but I donât really like being home long. Somehow I get stuck doing chores, and I get aggravated.â
âIâll tell you what, if we get through enough of the grading, we can do something really fun.â
âDeal.â She smiles.
Sometimes Y/N felt like this was only hard for her, but it killed Harry. He had fantasies of bending Y/N over his desk, or even just kissing her good morning. He even started letting her come over on Friday nights instead of Saturday because he just couldnât wait any longer. He knew he was being overly careful, but he just couldnât risk it.
//
Harry stayed true to his word. They got through a lot of the grading so drove them out to the coast for a walk on the pier at a large beach. It was still too chilly for real beach weather, but there were less people around this time of year, and some of the shops were open. Y/N clung to Harryâs arm and they both just enjoyed the fresh air and the scenery. He took her to a nice dinner, and then they walked for a bit to watch the sunset.
âThis was the perfect day.â She sighs as they begin their drive back to his place.
âIt really was.â His rests his hand on her thigh and gives it a squeeze. âI love you, Y/N.â
She whips her head to look at him. His eyes were focused on the road. Tears start to prick at her eyes. No one ever said that to her before. She had been in relationships, but she never really got to a point for such strong words, and she certainly never felt it back.
âI love you, too.â
âAw, look at us.â He smiles. âTwo people in love.â
âI wasnât expecting you to say thatâŠâ She sniffles.
âHey, no need to cry, darling.â
âI justâŠno oneâs ever told me they loved me before.â
âWhat?!â He squeezes her leg tighter. âBut thereâs so much to love. Youâre kind, caring, an incredible baker, witty, funny, brilliant-â
âHarry, please.â She chuckles. âWhen we get home weâre making love.â
âIâve made love to you before, just didnât say anything. Anytime weâre really soft and careful, Iâm making love to you.â
âGod.â Her face flushes, thinking of the many sensual times heâs touched her. âWell, I canât wait to do it again.â
//
It was a Tuesday, which meant Y/N wouldnât be in the office with Harry. She had class and then a shift at Bentoâs. He wanted her to be able to nap in between. He saw that the open IDS position had been posted, and he emailed her immediately. He couldnât wait to work on her resume and cover letter together.
âHarry?â Constance knocks on the outside of his door.
âHey, Connie! Come on in.â He beams at her. She squints at his collar, seeing just the top of a love bite.
âDid you see that girlfriend of yours this weekend?â She asks, as she sits down.
âSure did.â He smiles. âI saw her for a while over spring break too, told her I loved her, and she said it back. Iâm on cloud nine. Mâsorry things didnât line up with your daughter, sheâs a very pretty girl. My friend Lou is single, maybe-â
âHarry, Harry.â She chuckles. âNo worries at all, sheâs been dating around a bit. I shouldnât have just assumed you were single, and thatâs great that you two are doing so well. I think I thought you werenât seeing anyone because with your last girlfriendâŠwellâŠyou had pictures of her on your desk, and you gushed about her. We donât even know this oneâs name.â
âYou will soon enough.â Harry did have pictures of Y/N, they were just discrete. His lock screen was the picture of them at his birthday, and his wallpaper was just a picture of her. He could look at her whenever he wanted. âSheâs, uh, finishing up grad school.â
âOh, good for her! Anyways, I came here to chat with you about my sabbatical. Obviously itâs turned into a full year instead of just the fall semester. Weâre going to have a department meeting, but I wanted to see how youâd feel about stepping in as department chair while Iâm gone.â
âAre you serious?!â He perks up.
âYes.â She chuckles.
âThat would be a dream! I have so many ideas, and-â
âIt would mean you wouldnât be able to teach as many classes, and youâll have more responsibilities over winter and summer break.â
âThatâs no problem, honestly. I only go to London for a couple of weeks, Iâm usually in the area for summer. Iâd love to give it a go. I didnât think Iâd be next in line.â
âItâs coming from my own suggestion. Iâve been doing this a long time, and I think youâd be great at it. It would sort of be a trial, and then when I come back we could reflect on the experience.â
Harry was buzzing, absolutely buzzing. He needed to tell Y/N about his good news, so he hops in his car, and zips over to her apartment. She was vegging out in a t-shirt and panties with Nessa and Charlotte, who were both dressed in the same thing. They hear the bell on their door.
âWho the fuck is that? Itâs nearly nine.â Nessa says.
âNo idea.â Y/N says, getting up to check it out. She sees Harry through the peephole. Her eyebrows raise, but she opens the door. âDr. Styles, to what do I owe the pleasure?â
âY/N, Iâm sorry forâŠâ He looks her up and down. âThis is how you open the door?!â
âI saw it was you.â She shrugs and steps aside to let him in.
âHi, Harry.â Charlotte and Nessa say at the same time.
âHi girls.â He smiles and looks at Y/N. âI got great news today and I just had to see you, can we got to your room?â
âOf course.â Once theyâre both in there, they sit on her bed. âSo whatâs up? I got your email about the job, Iâm really excited.â
âGood news for both of us today. Connie, my department chair, came by to see me today, and she wants me to be department chair while sheâs on sabbatical next year while sheâs gone. It would be like a trial run. Me! Department chair! I have so many ideas, this is the opportunity Iâve been hoping for.â
âOh, Harry.â She throws her arms around him. âThatâs incredible, Iâm so happy for you.â
âThanks.â He holds her in his arms for a moment and then lets her go so he can stand up. âAlright, Iâll see you tomorrow.â
âHarryâŠâ She whines.
âDonât start, I just wanted to see your face when I told you.â
âYou could have FaceTimed me.â
âOh.â He shakes his head. âItâs been a long day.â He chuckles.
âYou can stay.â
âNo, I canât.â He caresses one of her cheeks. âI want to, but I canât. Soon, babe, so soon.â
âUmâŠâ She stands up and looks down. âIf I get this jobâŠI meanâŠthe lease for this place is up June first, andâŠwellâŠthe girls are going to be working in schools, and wonât need to live here anymore, andâŠI mean, I could find new roommate and sign a new lease...â
âOr, you could come move in with me.â He takes her hands in his and kisses her knuckles.
âReally?â
âYeah, I want you to. I want you around all the time. Being apart from you during the week really fucks with how clingy I naturally am.â He smirks.
âI like it, though. We spend all weekend in your big, comfy bed.â
âLook forward to it every week.â He sighs happily. âJust gotta get through you walking across that stage, yeah?â
âYeah.â
âAlright.â He kisses her cheek. âI love you, sweet dreams.â
âI love you too.â
//
Harry helped Y/N apply for the job, and after two nerve-wracking rounds of interviews, and two weeks of pure stress that even Harryâs cock couldnât squash, she got the call that she got the job. Harry took Y/N out to celebrate, they both nearly cried when she got the call. She told her parents and they were ecstatic.
âIn a few years, if you feel like it, you could get your PhD for free through the university.â He says to her as theyâre laying in bed.
âHm, three degrees from the same place.â She taps her chin. âDoesnât seem like a great idea.â
âIf you can do it for free, you should. It was the smartest thing I ever did. Well that, and giving into you.â
âGiving into me?!â She laughs. âYou make it sound like I seduced you.â
âI fell for you so hard. Youâre just so wonderful.â He pouts. âAre your parents excited to meet me in a couple of weeks? Iâm excited to meet them.â
âTheyâre definitely curious to see who the guy Iâm going to be moving in with is.â
âAre you going to miss the girls?â
âSo much! Theyâve been great to live with. Nessaâs moving in with Andy. She found a college in the city he works in to teach at. Sheâs so good at putting productions together, Iâm excited for her. Charlotte may be in the area, though. Something tells me the school sheâll be teaching at is close by to Niall.â
âIâve never seen him so smitten. He takes the more serious part of a relationship slow, but once heâs in heâs in.â He pulls her closer to him. âEverythingâs falling into place. Iâve been working with Connie to get prepared for the fall, and I couldnât be more excited.â
âIâm really proud of you.â
âIâm proud of you too, babe.â
//
The day they had both been waiting for was finally here. The graduate ceremony was in the evening, separate from the undergraduate ceremony. Y/N wouldnât be able to see Harry until after the ceremony. She was busy with her parents and younger siblings. Harry may have clapped and cheered extra loud when she walked across the stage. Most people around him thought it was just because she had been his TA for an entire year. Literally no one suspected more was going on between them. After today it wouldnât matter anyways.
There was a champagne reception after the ceremony. Y/N easily found her family.
âWeâre so proud of you honey. Another degree, a new job, and youâre moving in with a guy!â Her mom says.
âIâm still not thrilled about the last part. We donât even know him.â Her dad says.
âBut I do, so itâs a good thing Iâm the one living with him, not you.â
Harry makes his way through the crowd over to her and her family. He takes a deep breath, and when she spots him she squeals. She runs over and jumps into his arms. They kiss as he swings her around.
âYou did it!â
âI did it!â They both jump up and down for a moment. âCome on.â She holds his hand to bring him over to everyone. âHarry, these are my parents, and my two younger siblings. Ellie is going to be a senior in college this fall, and Ryan is going to be a sophomore. Heâs actually transferring here in the fall.â
âThatâs great! Hi, itâs so nice to meet all of you.â He shakes everyoneâs hands.
âDamn, a PhD.â Ellie whispers to her sister and winks. âNice job.â The girls giggle together.
They all decide to go out to dinner together to get to know each other better. Harry and Y/N would be meeting up with Charlotte, Nessa, and the others at the bar once dinner was over. Y/N explains how they waited a while to make things official because Harry wanted to make sure things remained professional. Harry easily impressed her parents. He was incredibly smart and knew how to work people over. Even her dad was happy with him.
Y/N got pretty drunk at the bar with her friends, and Harry was able to keep his arms around her all night without a care in the world. When he got her inside his place, he couldnât stop kissing her and telling her much he loved her over and over. She was excited to start her new job in a couple of weeks, and he was excited she genuinely wanted to stay, and wasnât just doing this for him. They would spend the time before starting her job to get her all moved in. They even talked about getting a larger place at some point.
âI canât wait to snuggle with Mac every night.â She giggles as she gets into bed.
âHey, what about me?â He pouts.
âI guess youâre nice to snuggle with too.â She jokes.
âMhm.â He kisses on her and hovers over her. âMy girlâs got her masterâs. Youâre so fucking smart, it turns me on.â
âReally?â
âWhen we did those mock interviews in my office I couldnât stop thinking about fucking you.â
âDoes this mean we can get a little sneaky in your office now?â She raises an eyebrow at him. âOr are you staying firm with your open door policy?â
âThink I may have to reconsider it, but only for you.â
#harry styles#harry styles one shot#harry styles imagine#harry styles fic#harry styles fanfic#harry styles x reader#harry styles x y/n#harry styles y/n#harry styles angst#harry styles slow burn#slow burn#harry styles fluff#harry styles smut#harry styles smut fic#hope you like!
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Quick housekeeping update
Hey everyone! Since this blog is mostly inactive these days it might not seem like this is a big update, but for ME this is a big update that took a lot of work!
Since I know many of you have been around since the early days of Tumblr like me, you're probably aware the way posts are formatted have changed. I was noticing problems with how old AND new posts were displaying across all my blogs, so over the past month or so I've been working on updating my themes, pages, etc. This blog is the first one that's finished! All posts, old and new, are now displayed correctly, my pages are all up to date, and everything is generally formatted to be more accessible across the board.
The exciting and fun part of this for me was that for this blog specifically, I learned a much more complicated javascript code than I had ever used before. I learned basic HTML/CSS/JS a few years ago, but I taught myself how to use an entirely new, much more complicated JS plugin than I've ever used before (tippy.js) for this blog. And now that my content is all organized and displaying perfectly, when I get back to making jokes, everything will look great on the dash and on my blog.
Huge, huge shoutouts to:
@vitaminholland, who made my theme and about page (and answered all my questions, chatted with me as I learned tippy, and is all-around great). If any of you are looking for a new theme that will show old and new posts correctly across the board (whether you reblogged them in 2014 or today), check them out!
@nonspace, who made my tags page and helped me get it looking EXACTLY as I wanted it to look
@glenthemes for helping me with figuring out how to minorly tweak old, broken posts on Tumblr's end to look correct again
It may seem silly to say I spent a ton of time working on all this, but truly, I started redoing everything back in December, and I'm proud that I taught myself new things and learned new tricks (from some very patient and amazing people on this website). I hope you'll take a look and, at the very least, can appreciate being able to actually read my horrible bad jokes without the text running over the post container!
#sassy speaks#the secret subtext of this is that my health has slowly been improving for the first time in almost three years#and doing this project and learning so much new stuff and UNDERSTANDING it has been a sign that the fog is clearing just a bit#i know i haven't been around on here much so i'm truly grateful to all of you for sticking with me.#hopefully i will be back to making jokes again soon but in the meantime#all my old stuff is easy to go through now
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Hetalia Matchup: Lithuania
Warnings: Fluff.
@somebodytouchmyspagett Request: hi local hyperfixated dork wondering who out of all the hetalia characters would be chill with a queerplatonic partnership with an aromantic asexual nonbinary autistic adult (28 yrs old). born and raised in florida, only ever been to about a half dozen other states and nowhere outside of the us of a, but deeply curious about other places. lot of copinglinks (aka kinning to cope with mental illness), i'm the host of an endogenic gateway system that generally has around a half dozen other members at any given time. too many mental/cognitive and physical diagnoses to easily list, i am in the weird position of loving food but being physically unable to easily cook and unable to eat a lot of things safely. you'll generally find me chilling online. i was unable to learn html due to ableism when i attempted college (trust me, i tried, best i could get was a high school degree), but i am deeply into geeky/nerdy things like how hex code colors work (look up the website bada55.io i LOVE IT), scripts ciphers and code systems like daukin and cistercian numerals, various internet memes like the road to el dorado guys and the spaghett bear and the is it art guy (the iron giant is god tier movie btw), homestuck, star trek (tng best in my opinion) and stargate, etc. i'd prefer someone quiet and understanding, however. anytime prussia is onscreen i've consistently had to turn down my computer volume, and i'm quite sensory defensive in other ways along with having significant social function, memory, and attention span issues.
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After reading through your description, I believe that you pair well with Lithuania!
As a Nation, Lithuania is more than well acquainted with all sorts of relationships. Heâs been with many people over the years, both Nations and humans, and he knows for a fact that the most basic and integral part of a relationship is trust and mutual respect. If you make it clear from the beginning your needs and wants in regards to your relationship, he will deliver without question while also expressing his own boundaries and expectations.. As you can see, your relationship is already off to a great start!
(You shouldnât be too surprised, heâs best friendsâand at times, moreâwith Poland).Â
Ah, youâve never been outside of the United States? But youâre still interested in other countries? Already, Lithuania respects that you want to learn more about different cultures. If you want, he will be your tour guide if you ever visit his home country. Touring his sites, walking down the streets of his most populous cities, and perhaps appreciating his countryside are on the top of the agenda if you choose to go with him. If your relationship has deepened to the point where he trusts you with many of his secrets, heâll even take you to national summits or international meetings. Not only will you be able to meet other Nations and explore the host Nationâs home, you can see him in his element as he tends to paperwork and reports in preparation for these important gatherings.
As for your mental health and disabilities, please inform Lithuania of your needs ahead of time. Although heâs a calm individual and can easily come up with solutions on the fly, he would rather not be blindsided by sudden problems. If you have any medications or appointments, heâll be there to support you and remind you of your prescriptions. However, if youâre not comfortable with disclosing these issues yet, heâll understand, but his offer stands: he will offer support if you ever need it.
Youâre in luck when it comes to food! His home may not be as renowned for its cuisine like Franceâs or Italyâs food, but he has learned how to cook a plethora of dishes from his time spent in working other Nationâs homes. Since he has spent time at Americaâs house as his personal aide, he knows how to make classic American cuisine. Again, please tell him of any dietary restrictions so that he can safely create foods that will suit your palate.Â
Your determination and hard work impresses Lithuania. Although he was never put into a position where he was banned from learning something because of his physical capabilities, he was pushed down time and time again because of his status as a pagan Nation and later, because he was Russiaâs unwilling lackey. He can relate to how it feels to have your options taken away because of arbitrary rules formed because of societyâs standards. Your continued interest in coding and technological jargon is enough of an indicator that you are a hard worker and perhaps there is still hope that you can still achieve your dreams.
Lithuania hopes that you turn to him in times of when you need it most. Having sensory issues can be a hard burden to bear in life, so heâll do his best to aid you in leading a lifestyle that wonât cause you undue stress. Please, if you feel like the world can be too much or if you simply want to sit in silence, know that heâll be there to support you all the way.
At his core, Lithuania is a caretaker. Once a connection between the two of you is formed, he will do his utmost to respect your needs and he hopes that you will reciprocate as well. There may be some hurdles in this relationship since he still bears the scars (mental and physical) of his past relationships with fellow Nations and has the telltale signs of trauma, but if the both of you push forward and respect each otherâs boundaries, youâll be fine.Â
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If you want to donate a Ko-Fi, feel free https://ko-fi.com/devintrinidad.
HETALIA AXIS POWERS/WORLD SERIES MASTERLIST
#hetalia#hetalia world series#hetalia axis powers#hetalia lithuania#aph lithuania#hws lithuania#hetalia matchup#character matchup#dearestones#devintrinidad
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hey, i started following you recently and ur bio says ur a hacker? any tips on where to start? hacking seems like a v cool/fun way to learn more abt coding and cybersecurity/infrastructure and i'd like to explore it but there's so much on the internet and like, i'm not trying to get into anything illegal. thanks!
huh, an interesting question, ty!
i can give more tailored advice if you hit me up on chat with more specifics on your background/interests.
given what you've written here, though, i'll just assume you don't have any immediate professional aspirations (e.g. you just want to learn some things, and you aren't necessarily trying to get A Cyber Security Job TM within the next three months or w/e), and that you don't know much about any specific programming/computering domain yet.
(stuff under cut because long)
first i'd probably just try to pick some interesting problem that you think you can solve with tech. this doesn't need to be a "hacking" project at first; i was just messing around with computers for ages before i did anything involving security/exploitation.
if you don't already know how to program, you should ideally pick a problem you can solve via programming. for instance: i learned a lot back in the 2000s, when play-by-post forum RPGs were in vogue. see, i'd already been messing around, building my own personal sites, first just with HTML & CSS, and later on with Javascript and PHP.  and i knew the forum software everyone used (InvisionPowerBoard) was written in PHP. so when one of the admins at my RPG complained that they'd like the ability to set multiple profile pictures, i was like, "hey i'm good at programming, want me to create a mod to do that," and then i just... did. so then they asked me to program more features, and i got all the sexy nerd cred for being Forum Mod Queen, and it was a good time, i learned a lot.
(i also got to be the person who was frantically IMed at 2am because wtf the forum is down and there's an inscrutable error, what do??? basically sysadmining! also, much less sexy! still, i learned a lot!)
the key thing is that it's gotta be a problem that's interesting to you: as much as i love making dorky sites in PHP, half the fun was seeing other people using my stuff, and i think the era of forum-based RPGs has passed. but maybe you can apply some programming talents to something that you are interested inâmaybe you want to make a silly Chrome extension to make people laugh, a la Cloud to Butt, or maybe you'd like to make a program that converts pixel art into cross-stitching patterns, maybe you want to just make a cool adventure game on those annoying graphing calculators they make you use in class, or make a script for some online game you play, or make something silly with Arduino (i once made a trash can that rolled toward me when i clapped my hands; it was fun, and way easier than you'd think!), whatever.
i know a lot of hacker-types who got their start doing ROM hacking for video gamesâreplacing the character art or animations or whatever in old NES games. that's probably more relevant than the PHP websites, at least, and is probably a solid place to get started; in my experience those communities tend to be reasonably friendly to questions. pick a small thing you want to do & ask how to do it.
also, a somewhat unconventional path, butâonce i knew how to program a bit of Python, i started doing goofy junk, like, "hey can i implemented NamedTuple from scratch,â which tends to lead to Python metaprogramming, which leads to surprising shit like "oh, stack frames are literally just Python objects and you can manually edit them in the interpreter to do deliberately horrendous/silly things, my god this language allows too much reflection and i'm having too much fun"... since Python is a lot of folks' first language these days, i thought i'd point that out, since i think this is a pretty accessible start to thinking about How Programs Actually Work under the hood. allison kaptur has some specific recommendations on how to poke around, if you wanna go that route.
it's reasonably likely you'll end up doing something "hackery" in the natural course of just working on stuff. for instance, while i was working on the IPB forum software mods, i became distressed to learn that everyone was using an INSECURE version of the software! no one was patching their shit!! i yelled at the admins about it, and they were like "well we haven't been hacked yet so it's not a problem," so i uh, decided to demonstrate a proof of concept? i downloaded some sketchy perl script, kicked it until it worked, logged in as the admins, and shitposted a bit before i logged out, y'know, to prove my point.
(they responded by banning me for two weeks, and did not patch their software. which, y'know, rip to them; they got hacked by an unrelated Turkish group two months later, and those dudes just straight-up deleted the whole website. i was a merciful god by comparison!)
anyway, even though downloading a perl script and just pointing it at a website isn't really "hacking" (it's the literal definition of script kiddie, heh)âthe point is i was just experimenting a lot and trying a lot of stuff, which meant i was getting comfortable with thinking of software as not just some immutable relic, but something you can touch and prod in unexpected ways.
this dovetails into the next thing, which is like, just learn a lot of stuff. a boring conventional computer science degree will teach you a lot (provided you take it seriously and actually try to learn shit); alternatively, just taking the same classes as a boring conventional computer science degree, via edX or whatever free online thingy, will also teach you a lot. ("contributing to open source" also teaches you a lot but... hngh... is a whole can of worms; send a follow-up ask if you want that rant.)
here's where i should note that "hacking" is an impossibly broad category: the kind of person who knows how to fuck with website authentication tokens is very different than someone who writes a fuzzer, who is often quite different than someone who looks at the bug a fuzzer produces and actually writes a program that can exploit that bug... so what you focus on depends on what you're interested in. i imagine classes with names like "compilers," "operating systems," and "networking" will teach you a lot. but, like, idk, all knowledge is god-breathed and good for teaching. hell, i hear some universities these days have actual computer security classes? that's probably a good thing to look at, just to get a sense of what's out there, if you already know how to program.
also be comfortable with not knowing everything, but also, learn as you go. the bulk of my security knowledge came when i got kinda airdropped into a work team that basically hired me entirely on "potential" (lmao), and uh, prior to joining i only had the faintest idea what a hypervisor was? or the whole protection ring concept? or ioctls or sandboxing or threat models or, fuck, anything? i mostly just pestered people with like 800 questions and slowly built up a knowledge base, and remember being surprised & delighted when i went to a security conference a year later and could follow most of the talks, and when i wound up at a bar with a guy on the xbox security team and we compared our security models a bunch, and so on. there wasn't a magic moment when i "got it", i was just like, "okay huh this dude says he found a ring-0 exploit... what does that mean... okay i think i got that... why is that a big deal though... better ask somebody.." (also: reading an occasional dead tree book is a good idea. i owe my firstborn to Robert Love's Linux Kernel Development, as outdated as it is, and also O'Reilly's kookaburra book gave me a great overview of web programming back in the day, etc. you can learn a lot by just clicking around random blogs, but youâll often end up with a lot of random little facts and no good mental scaffolding for holding it together; often, a decent book will give you that scaffolding.)
(also, it's pretty useful if you can find a knowledgable someone to pepper with random questions as you go. finding someone who will actively mentor you is tricky, but most working computery folks are happy to tell you things like "what you're doing is actually impossible, here's why," or "here's a tutorial someone told me was good for learning how to write a linux kernel module," or "here's my vague understanding of this concept you know nothing about," or "here's how you automate something to click on a link on a webpage," which tends to be handier than just google on its own.)
if you're reading this and you're like "ok cool but where's the part where i'm handed a computer and i gotta break in while going all hacker typerââthat's not the bulk of the work, alas! like, for sure, we do have fun pranking each other by trying dumb ways of stealing each other's passwords or whatever (once i stuck a keylogger in a dude's keyboard, fun times). but a lot of my security jobs have involved stuff like, "stare at this disassembly a long fuckin' time to figure out how the program pointer got all fucked up," or, "write a fuzzer that feeds a lot of randomized input to some C++ program, watch the program crash because C++ is a horrible language for writing software, go fix all the bugs," or "think Really Hard TM about all the settings and doohickeys this OS/GPU/whatever has, think about all the awful things someone could do with it, threat model and sandbox accordingly." occasionally i have done cool proof-of-concept hacks but honestly writing exploits can kinda be tedious, lol, so like, i'm only doing that if it's the only way i can get people to believe that Yes This Is Actually A Problem, Fix Your Code
"lua that's cool and all but i wanted, like, actual links and recommendations and stuff" okay, fair. here's some ideas:
microcorruption: very fun embedded security CTF; teaches you everything you need to know as you're doing it.
cryptopals crypto challenges: very fun little programming exercises that teach you a lot of fundamental cryptography concepts as you're going along! you can do these even as a bit of a n00b; i did them in Python for the lulz
the binary bomb lab is hilariously copied by, like, so many CS programs, lol, but for good reason. it's accessible and fun and is the first time most people get to feel like a real hacker! (requires you know a bit of C beforehand)
ctftime is a good way to see when new CTFs ("capture the flag"s; security-focused competitions) are coming up. or, sometimes CTFs post their source code, so you can continue trying them after the CTF is over. i liked Stripe's CTFs when they were going, because they focused on "web stuff", and "web stuff" was all i really knew at the time. if you're more interested in staring at disassembly, there's CTFs focused on that sort of thing too.
azeria has good ARM assembly & exploitation tutorials
also, like, lots of good talks out there; just watching defcon/cansecwest/etc talks until something piques your interest is very fun. i'd die on a battlefield for any of Christopher Domas's talks, but he assumes a lot of specific x86/OS knowledge, lol, so maybe donât start with that. oh, Julia Evans's blog is honestly probably pretty good for just learning a lot of stuff and really beginner-friendly?
oh and wrt legality... idk, i haven't addressed it here since it hasn't come up in my own work much, tbh. if you're just getting started you're kind of unlikely to Break The Law without, y'know, realizing maybe you're doing something a bit gray-area? and you can cross that bridge when you come to it? Real Hacking TM is way more of a pain-in-the-ass than doing CTFs and such, and you'll learn way more with the latter, so who cares lol just do the fun thing
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My eBook Passion
Okay, so... Last week, I was chatting with @elvenwhovian about eBooks, how I make them, and how I got into doing it. So I provided a bit of background. So for any of you who may be wondering (and you, Elvy), hereâs the full story:
I got into eBooks a while back when figuring out a way to read stuff without having a physical copy because I didnât have the space to keep actual books. Though technically I guess it was many years before that when I played with the idea of the early eBook format, when I really wanted to publish my own works, but that was just a passing phase at that point. It was several years later that eBooks really grabbed my attention, due to the aforementioned space issue.
In reading some of them, I found errors and wondered how to fix them. I already had a basic background in HTMLâand a little CSSâcoding, having had my own website for a while. So when I learned that eBooks were basically websites in a wrapper, I thought âHey, I could get into this.â Fast forward to a few years later and I started researching how to create and code my own eBooks.
Then one day I came across Blue Sky which I thought would be great as an eBook, and with Wafflesâ permission, I made the book and posted it. This led me down the path of learning more about eBook coding.
From there, it took off like crazy and I made a few more collections based in the Blue Sky Portal AU, then ElvenWhovianâs The Trial of the Bow and Vessel of Fire trilogies.
Some time later, once I learned more, I revised and updated The Trial of the Bow and Vessel of Fire, started working on ElvenWhovianâs VoF sequel The Wayfarer Chronicles, and eventually plan on going to back to revise and update the others.
I hope to continue in this endeavour as creating and editing these has become a passion. Granted, Iâm still not a super professional expert, and thereâs still a lot to learn, but Iâve come a long way since I first started.
We all start somewhere and get better with time and practice, and even sometimes a little patience.
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Why do I redirect all my websites from HTML to WordPress
Switching to a WordPress site is a great option. I am currently ready to build great websites for my clients to help them grow their organizations. When asked which page I offer. I offer HTML for WordPress services in Toronto. Did I mention the layout I use is free? It makes me a lot sharper when potential customers realize the cost. For many of these reasons, it's also the reason why I switch every single one of my websites from HTML to WordPress.
At the time, we were looking for other productive ways of web-based training, and I agree that we hope to move from proprietary frameworks based on individual capabilities to more general tools for improvement. That tool is HTML. This is a huge confidence boost, as our preparatory materials for the presentation of our new product reach more than 300,000 people worldwide. In addition, the exchange of upgrades is considered dangerous.
Before my administrator, the best marketing pioneer in our department, agrees to call again, we hope to show our hypothesis from time to time. I remember the day I asked two training engineers to take our innovative thinking and use HTML for a WordPress service. They rely on them to report their results and show how many objects they can make in seven days. I let him work with the Kroger manuscript without constantly hunching over. The result is very good. Besides the fact that they created an entire training class, they were actually structured twice or more to make it much better. They find that learning HTML is easy when you add content to a prepared format.
Because of this great basic result, I believe that HTML is the most important tool for coding websites. As my group proved more capable with Dreamweaver and the HTML encoder, our training page became even more impressive.
My calling continued and I joined an insurance agency in 2000 as a unique online managing director. And then my life changed when I was introduced to a content management system (CMS) site improvement tool. This new tool, Flypaper, is completely different in that it is a server-side tool that you use to create online page content. However, I've observed that the trial is free because non-developers suddenly add apps to the page without a software engineer having to compile the critical code. In 2001 I left my corporate business and with that reality hit. When Flypaper's innovation went wrong, I went back to building my own HTML site and I had to study the code and get it working.
After more than 25 years of preparatory discussions, it's actually not that hard to turn my network-based training organization into a web association. In addition, it is assumed that I should be ready to create a quick search page in a search engine. In 2005, I've found some high-level HTML editors that allow me to compile code-free, but these pages are not as smart as they should be. At a meeting on the internet I was introduced to WordPress, first as a blog and then as a regular static site. I found that WordPress was all I needed and, surprisingly, a lot more.
After working on about five web-based moderation frameworks, I finally found one of the first WordPress tools that made it easy for administrators to migrate my 50+ site space. Then I started looking for the perfect layout to migrate my HTML locale to an easy-to-view loom. I decided on three layouts and studied them so I could quickly build another site. I get very productive because I can set up other websites for action, add custom pages to the site, keyword rich posts and pages, and add custom structures like polls, contact us or request forms and are very useful on the web. - Robot for two or three hours. Then of course I appreciate changing the content (text, sound, video, phrases) to make it better.
Switching to a WordPress site is a great option. I am currently ready to build great websites for my clients to help them grow their organizations. When asked which page I offer. I offer HTML for WordPress services in Toronto. Did I mention the layout I use is free? It makes me a lot sharper when potential customers realize the cost. For many of these reasons, it's also the reason why I switch every single one of my websites from HTML to WordPress.
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